Site Areas
Wedding Centre
Health Club
Marriage Clinic
Chapel
University
Citizen's Centre
Coffee Shop
Admin Centre

Contents
Articles
Books
CDs / Videos
Tips
Services

Resources
Forums
Membership
Contact Us
Site map
Link to Us

Search

Free Tell A Friend from Bravenet


In association with:

Marriage books and much more from Amazon.co.uk

Celebrate your marriage with flowers!

Set up your Wedding Registry!

Marriage and divorce advice from justask.org.uk

Take our Demographic survey

Family Friendly Site

   Home  > Health Club > Later years > Articles

What happened to our sex life?

By Ms HeartBeat - Relationship Advice Columnist

I’ve been very happily married for years. When we first met my wife and I had great sex, now she’s almost a dead fish and doesn’t seem to like sex anymore. I can never get enough and I’m lucky if we make love once a month. I’m a Christian man and don’t want to leave her, but feel like she baited and hooked me, then hung me out to dry! My physical appearance has improved since we met, but hers has gone steadily downhill. I’ve tried to romance her, work out harder, and we’ve talked. She says it’s not me, but she just doesn’t have the desire anymore. What can I do?

Lack of sexual interest is one of the primary complaints of married couples in this decade. More and more often though, it’s the WOMAN complaining about her man’s lack of interest. There are always many possibilities - including alcohol and drug abuse, stress, an affair, withholding sex as punishment for failure to receive kindness and affection out of bed, fear of getting pregnant, a health condition that affects libido, medication, no longer physically attracted to mate, in need of understanding that their mate isn’t giving, or worry about money or employment issues. When a woman turns off to her husband or boyfriend, it’s usually because she’s angry about something or many things, resentful, no longer in love with that man, or she is still in love with him but feels unappreciated.

One suggestion I have is that you get into couples counseling at your place of worship. Perhaps in that warm environment with someone she trusts to guide her, your wife will feel safe enough to say exactly what it is she needs that you or this marriage aren’t giving her, and why she has become so sad. Women need affection, attention, kind words and romance, to be listened to, pampered frequently, and treated like they are special and important individuals, not looked at solely as sex objects.

I also strongly suggest that she get a complete physical right away. There could be a medical problem for her tiredness, weight gain and lack of desire such as nutritional deficiency, high blood pressure, diabetes, hormone imbalance, etc.

Things are not always as they seem my friend, so stop automatically thinking that the problem you are having with your marriage is something she is doing TO you! A healthy young woman with no sexual desire is not normal. It is my humble opinion that when men and women within previously loving and sexual relationships lose interest in sex, there are unresolved issues or problems coping with some aspect of life. These individuals need help, not to hear you nagging.


Bookmark and Share
Printer Friendly
More From this author

Related
- Becoming a Parent-in-law - a life transition
- Keeping the romantic spark in a long-term relationship
- What happened to our sex life?

Hot Picks
- 6th National Relationship Education Conference
-
- Take the Couple Check-up!
- Marriage first aid
-
- Marriage help for friends
- Deepen your love & marriage

Discuss
- Marriage Help
- Marriage news from around the world
- Coffee Shop Chat - have some fun!!
- Marriage Problems - ask for help!
- Visit the Index

Copyright 1997-2000 Panache Promotions. All rights reserved. Used with permission


 2-in-2-1 Today
Take our Couple Checkup - put your relationship on strong foundations by checking out the strengths and growth areas!
Difficulties communicating? - 55 cards to improve your couple communication
What people say about 2-in-2-1 - we thrive on your feedback!
Couples Wanted!! - for TV and press enquiries - tell your story!
Cyber sex and Internet addiction - is the internet threatening your marriage??

Top

Copyright ©1999-2024 2-in-2-1 Limited. All rights reserved. Disclaimer Privacy Statement