All you need is love!
By Kate
How can we love unconditionally?
So what does this decision to love involve. It involves:
- wanting what is best for the other person, as much or more than what is best for us
- forgiving them and not holding out for revenge
- accepting them warts and all, rather than trying to change them
- looking for ways to show that we care for them and value them
- believing that things can change for the better.
That sort of love is powerful - it can break down indifference, heal hurts, soften hearts and bring out the best in others. But it's costly too. It can't live alongside pride or selfishness or bitterness or unforgiveness. They have to go, if you want to be able to love that way.
It's very hard to love when you get absolutely nothing in return or even worse if you are being constantly let down. Most of us love others and treat them well, because we believe that then they will love us. That's not such a bad reason to love someone, but what do we do when they don't act lovingly towards us or let us down?
If we see love as being about giving to each other, about being the best we can for each other, rather than finding fulfilment, then our relationship is more likely to flourish.