Re: loving 2 people
How can you love your wife? That is not love but pity.
Your relationship with this other woman is nothing but lust.
You need to spend some time on your knees in prayer let God lead you where you must go from here.
This sounds like what is going on with my husband. He is intimate with me every 4 years in between he doesn't show affection . If I get mad at him for anything he goes and starts sleeping in other room. He has recently this this for a whole year. I can't point a finger at him and say you are having an affair. I don't know what is going on.
But, you must let go of this other person and, pray about what you should do about the relationship between you and your wife.