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Old 16th August 2015, 07:31 PM   #1
BraveDancer
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Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Hi,

Posting an article link.

It's talking about Our Society in general does not have "Saving Marriage" in priority.

http://www.wmsgs.net/2015/08/why-sav...r-our-society/


It argues that formal education isn't oriented towards it, and it's mainly about money.People learn about "marriage" and it's importance in the crisis mode and it should change.

Any comments welcome.

Brave Dancer !
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Well.. long story short - went through hell and back... and i am happy i didn't give up. It was on the brink of collapse... lost weight and everything, but turned around. It was amazing turn around. But now happy.. with 2 kids and going strong ! Thanks for all the souls who helped me then ! One thing I realized is - yes you do need expert help !
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Old 16th August 2015, 07:44 PM   #2
chosen
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

There are loads of resources and places to go to for help with marriage problems, more than there ever have been, but both partners have to want to use the help that is available.
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Old 16th August 2015, 07:49 PM   #3
BraveDancer
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Quote:
Originally Posted by chosen View Post
There are loads of resources and places to go to for help with marriage problems, more than there ever have been, but both partners have to want to use the help that is available.
Chosen,

Agree with you. But there are many examples where one of the partner turned around the situation. Article focuses on importance our society gives to this relation to train us.

Yes, totally in agreement, when both are committed, it's the best one can ask for.
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Well.. long story short - went through hell and back... and i am happy i didn't give up. It was on the brink of collapse... lost weight and everything, but turned around. It was amazing turn around. But now happy.. with 2 kids and going strong ! Thanks for all the souls who helped me then ! One thing I realized is - yes you do need expert help !
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Old 25th August 2015, 01:02 PM   #4
Sylvia Smith
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

This is a sad reality of our time. Most people leave or end their relationships since they are unable to surmount their issues or give up too soon. Marriage is a life-long committment that demands to be nourished with time, patience, love, honesty and integrity. Couples need to give time to each other and make consistent efforts at improving their marital life, day after day. Saving a marriage and keeping it healthy must be of topmost priority. A bond as strong as marriage offers great rewards: family joys, emotional stability, physical wellbeing to name just a few. If your marriage is in trouble, do make a priority to save it.
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Old 25th August 2015, 04:42 PM   #5
Lindentree1
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

I'm all for saving a marriage, but both people in the marriage have to want to save it. If one party is determined to leave, there is little you can do to stop it. Ask several people on here who were left by their spouse if they wanted to save their marriage. One person wanting it isn't good enough. Both people have to be committed. Sometimes that is just not the case.
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Old 25th August 2015, 04:58 PM   #6
chosen
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lindentree1 View Post
I'm all for saving a marriage, but both people in the marriage have to want to save it. If one party is determined to leave, there is little you can do to stop it. Ask several people on here who were left by their spouse if they wanted to save their marriage. One person wanting it isn't good enough. Both people have to be committed. Sometimes that is just not the case.
Yes very true. As in my husbands case, he was divorced against his will by his ex wife. Not a lot you can do in that case.
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Old 25th August 2015, 08:27 PM   #7
ralfgarnett
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sylvia Smith View Post
This is a sad reality of our time. Most people leave or end their relationships since they are unable to surmount their issues or give up too soon. Marriage is a life-long committment that demands to be nourished with time, patience, love, honesty and integrity. Couples need to give time to each other and make consistent efforts at improving their marital life, day after day. Saving a marriage and keeping it healthy must be of topmost priority. A bond as strong as marriage offers great rewards: family joys, emotional stability, physical wellbeing to name just a few. If your marriage is in trouble, do make a priority to save it.
I agree with you Sylvia, but both Lindentree & Chosen are correct when they say both partners need to want to save the marriage, but if one wants out and one doesn't then your pretty much fighting a losing battle I'm sorry to say, both Lindentree and myself are both very sadly witness to that.
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Old 10th September 2015, 04:30 AM   #8
melly997
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Sadly marriage has just become another 'victim' of today's disposable society. Marriage needs to be worked at, needs discipline, needs a long term commitment - all skills that we no longer value, teach or put effort into because it's easier to walk away, easier to accept no responsibility & easier to move on to someone else.
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Old 10th September 2015, 09:47 AM   #9
Raymond
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Well said Melly. That's what I live by and my wife does as well. In some ways it gets better and deeper as you go on.
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Old 10th September 2015, 12:57 PM   #10
chosen
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

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Well said Melly. That's what I live by and my wife does as well. In some ways it gets better and deeper as you go on.
yes it does
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Old 14th September 2015, 11:42 AM   #11
Raymond
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Maybe for them but not for those who see much more importance in marriage. For those who are married it should be the main relationship of their life and with that in mind it is well worth preserving. So long as two are faithful there is everything to go for.
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Old 14th September 2015, 11:47 AM   #12
ralfgarnett
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

I wish we could save our marriage, I actually feel physically ill today just thinking about it over and over.
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Old 16th September 2015, 09:29 AM   #13
Raymond
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Why isn't she coming back? Do you know the reason? I know she seem to have some kind of breakdown to do with work but that is a long time ago now.
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Old 16th September 2015, 09:35 AM   #14
chosen
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

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Originally Posted by ralfgarnett View Post
I wish we could save our marriage, I actually feel physically ill today just thinking about it over and over.
Please stop thinking about it over and over ralf its not doing any good, DO things to take you mind off it. Get that part time work, do voluntary work, get out there in the community, meet people, make more friends, get away on your own for a break. We can control what we think about ralf, we are not slaves to our minds.
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Old 16th September 2015, 04:06 PM   #15
ralfgarnett
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Re: Why saving marriage" isn't a priority?

Quote:
Originally Posted by chosen View Post
Please stop thinking about it over and over ralf its not doing any good, DO things to take you mind off it. Get that part time work, do voluntary work, get out there in the community, meet people, make more friends, get away on your own for a break. We can control what we think about ralf, we are not slaves to our minds.
Hi Chosen I wish I could control my thoughts, I wish it was that simple, I even tried CBT and it didn't help so I packed it in, I feel so hurt and let down that the pain overwhelms me sometimes, if there had been obvious problems in our marriage then I would of seen the writing on the wall and maybe even been able to do something about it before it escalated in to what happened, but there were no signs of any kind and she just dropped the bomb on me out of no where and I still struggle to understand and cope with that because it's just not her style she just didn't do things like that and she was the last person on earth that I thought could ever hurt me but she has done and I'm still shocked by it over a year later, I have been back to hospital today for my ultrasound and I spent time in the waiting room thinking I was going to see her any minute but I didn't of course , I'm not doing any more voluntary work I didn't end up liking last time and its put me off for now at least if not permanently, I have booked a holiday though taking 7 days away very soon.

Last edited by ralfgarnett; 16th September 2015 at 04:12 PM.
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