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Old 2nd April 2016, 06:28 PM   #1
cherrybomb
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Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 18
help .advice please..im falling

Hi guys ..
Really need some advice here
Me and my husband have had a really bad time this year .he lost his dad .and he was like a best friend to me so its been hard on us both..however he has took a new job as he was unhappy in his last job so I encouraged him to apply for something new ..things have only getting worse he work more hours and longer days and nights ..all that I ask is that when hes at home you helps me out and does his bit around the house ..and helps with the kids but he doesnt he says im unreasonable and a nagg when I check him for not helping and playing on his computer ..laitly after arguments he threats to leave cause hes had enough ..I work also I take and pick the kids up from school I make meals every night for him comming in from work run him baths wash his cloths and he claims our marrage is ****ty ..but he never leaves ..I tell him I dont want to throw away the last 15 year over things that he should help with anyways ..isnt that the joys of having a family ..only now im left thinking whos getten the crappy end of the deal here and im always left feeling more lonely and hupset than before ..I dont know what else I can do to make him see what he has here ..or walk away from it all ..I carnt help thinking I could make someone very happy

Thanks for listening guys xx
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Old 2nd April 2016, 09:22 PM   #2
chosen
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
Re: help .advice please..im falling

cherry have you thought about marriage counselling?
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Old 2nd April 2016, 09:26 PM   #3
cherrybomb
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Re: help .advice please..im falling

He wont xgo to councilling ..infact im not so sure he wants to sort anything out ..he says theres nothing to sort just me being a baby ..everything is fine if I shut up and put up x
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Old 4th April 2016, 08:06 AM   #4
Raymond
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Join Date: Dec 2006
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Re: help .advice please..im falling

Maybe if he is working long hours now he needs time to unwind? It depends if you are going out to work as well. If you are then he is doing too many hours at work perhaps. My wife didn't work and so she did do the cooking, shopping and looked after the children during the day, took them to school etc. I would take the children out a lot for fun and did baths and stuff but basically she did take care of the house apart from DIY gardening etc. I don't think there are any rules but if it comes down to "you ought to" then it can create a lot of marriage problems as it would be judging the other person. We are all different but I am sure there are better ways of doing it. Everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. We can enjoy the strengths and encourage the other areas but not through nagging I think.
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