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Old 6th December 2015, 04:44 PM   #1
rhino14
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Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 2
Think my wife cheated

Hello there, I'm really unsure if I'm totally wrong or not so I hope someone here may be able to help.

My wife has spent the last year dieting very successfully & is quite rightly very pleased with herself, as a treat she completely changed her hairstyle & colour.

Her weight loss has given her renewed confidence as has her sexy new red hair. Long story short she had her works Christmas bash at a top hotel on Friday night, the logistics of her getting home before I got up to go to work work difficult, I was due to go out about 4am & she wasn't due home till around 2am, she promised to let me know when she was heDing home & keep me updated on the journey even though I should be asleep, due to worrying a little I was just dozing & was aware when she text me her expected home times.

I was awake when she got home but unusually she went straight to the bathroom to get undressed, I heard her use the toilet & clean her teeth before she came & got in to bed, she seemed happy & a little drunk we spoke briefly about her evening.

I moved in for a cuddle which she seemed to like but I immediately became aware that she was giving off an unusual aroma, I took this as she was feeling horny, I was very quickly warned off. We chatted for a little more but I couldn't get passed an obvious sexy smell. I was starting to worry, I made an excuse & went to the toilet, & just took a minute to try & talk myself out of what I wa starting to worry about, against my better judgement I checked the wash basket for her evening wear, her dress was on top, underneath was her matching Bra & Knickers (which she never wore) I noticed the knickers slightly tucked underneath clothes I put in before I went to bed, I picked them up only to notice a stronger smell, they were also damp like she had become excited.

I'm now worried, when I got home from work yesterday she hardly spoke to me instead sleeping on the sofa & just grunting answers back to me, she has hardly anything to say to me about her evening apart from a few titbits of info.

The final "clue" that something may have happened came from a text message I got from a friend I've not heard from in 3 years, he simply asked "did I see your B** at Waterloo last night? Strange that he would text me that when we live in the same town & must have seen us plenty of times in passing. I'm afraid to ask him what he saw in case the answer is something I won't like.

What do I do, there are signs here that something happened, she's usually such a strong believer in family but something here just doesn't ring right.
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Old 6th December 2015, 06:11 PM   #2
chosen
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
Re: Think my wife cheated

Ask the friend. You need to know the truth. Its does sound odd, and why isnt she speaking to you now?Guilt?

Last edited by chosen; 6th December 2015 at 11:51 PM.
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Old 7th December 2015, 11:28 AM   #3
rhino14
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Re: Think my wife cheated

So took the plunge last night, messaged my friend, he wouldn't say anything but just ask your wife who she was with. I waited until our daughter was in bed then asked her, at first she just said 3 girls from her dept, then her face just fell & to my horror she admitted the whole sordid night. She had met a male colleague who she'd only previously spoken on the phone too, they chatted for a while before someone came round with misseltoe, she said they both said no but were pestered so she tipped her head to allow him to kiss her on the cheek, which at first he did, then he moved in again to her lips, she said she pushed him away but was flattered, he apologised & moved on. Later that night they bumped in again & he apologised again, she apparently told him to forget it, he then proceeded to tell her she was beautiful & sexy, & if she hadn't been married he would have love to have kissed her properly. She again spurned his advances but admitted she was now very flattered. Towards then end of the evening a group of the girls including my wife planned to walk back to Waterloo with a few of the males tagging along too, she said she hadn't noticed him at first walking back but about halfway he moved alongside & said hello, she was wearing heels & was lagging behind, he offered to link arms & help. She says the rest happened very quickly. She stumbled & he caught her, he said sorry for this & kissed her, she admitted to kissing him back & not pushing him away. She said she thought that would be it but when they got back to the station he was getting the same train as her, & getting off at the same stop, this I still disbelieve but anyway, she said they shared a double seat home as the train was packed & he kept touch her leg slightly, she admitted to being aroused & when they got off the train they kissed again, this time they found a quiet dark spot where she said they kissed passionately & relived eachother through clothing. All the while she was crying & saying sorry. She has rung in sick this week from work to see if we can rescue ur marriage but I'm just not sure. She clearly fancied this bloke & I'm not convinced they didn't have full sex.
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Old 7th December 2015, 02:41 PM   #4
chosen
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Re: Think my wife cheated

well she has cheated even if they didnt have full sex. You need to decide now what you want to do next. It may depend on whether you have children, how long you have been married, if you can trust her again, and many other factors.
She seems sorry and has told you what happened, (even if you arent sure its its the full truth), which is positive, but I cant help thinking that its pretty hard to relieve someone through clothing. Maybe you can question her more and thank her for what she has already told you, but that you are not satisfied she has told you the full story, and that you need to know the full truth before you go any further.

IF you do decide to stay, maybe some marriage counseling may help, and also some setting of strong boundaries in her relationships with men in the future.
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Old 7th December 2015, 07:17 PM   #5
Lindentree1
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Re: Think my wife cheated

Sorry that this has happened to you, Rhino.

Try to not to make any decisions about your marriage when you are so upset. I agree you need to talk to her and make sure she is telling the truth.

As Chosen said, counseling might be necessary in the future. You don't want to go through married life not being able to trust her.
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Old 7th December 2015, 09:47 PM   #6
Raymond
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Re: Think my wife cheated

I feel for you Rhino. It does need to be cleared up if it can be. If you are right then obviously it is quite serious. Have a word with your friend and her to clarify.

With her I wouldn't go straight for it by asking her if she slept with someone at work. Ask her how the party went and watch her when she replies. You should get a strong inkling coupled with your friends reports.
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Old 20th December 2015, 12:28 AM   #7
mirry
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Re: Think my wife cheated

get rid, i'm sorry mate but this is completely out of order what she has done :-( horrific
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