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Old 20th October 2010, 04:58 PM   #1
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My Paranoid theory was right, wife was cheating

Hi to you all.

A few months back I posted a thread stating that I had suspicions that my wife was cheating on. Asfter a few responses I kind of agree that I could just be paranoid and back off. I done this and gave her support in everyway she wanted including her own space, home decisions and all.

Well what a blow to the head. I was right. Sunday night gone, she looked and me and told me that she couldnt do this anymore, took off her wedding ring and put it on the table saying I dont love you anymore and I want you out by the end of the month. I asked her why and she said that she still loves me but not in love with me (no such thing). Then I asked if there was anyone else. She said no. Then I asked where she had been going to all this time and leaving our son home alone till the late hours. She said at girlfriends. So I left it at that and couldnt sleep all night.

At 5 in the morning she comes downstairs and shocked to see me awake. I tried to talk to her and she said it was all my fault, I done all the harm to the marriage. I got my son ready for school at and then my wife left for work.

When I was home alone I sat and wondered why the sudden change of heart. Then I done what I shouldnt have done. I checked her online mobile account and discovered that she has been ringing certain numbers hundreds of times a month. One particular number was called before she broke it up with me, during her telling me that she no longer loves me and after when she went to bed. So I called this number and a young guy answered it, sounded like he was in his early twenties. My heart sunk. I couldnt believe it. I texted her and asked her who the guy was if there was no one else. No response so i called her and she couldnt answer the question, then all she said was that he was a close friend and none of my business and that she does not have to answer to me. The close friend is a secret to everyone because as not I, the kids, friends or family know who this guy is. So I moved out in the same day. I couldnt be there after discovering that. However for the past two years and especially the last 12 months I had suspected she was cheating. Now its clear she has been and working things out she has done so several times. She works in a coffee cafe shop. There were times I walked in and guys were talking to her and she laughing but then goes quiet once she sees me and acts as if they were ordering.

The bit that really kills me is that unknown to me, for a few months she had been going out and seeing the guys and leaving our son home alone till 9, 10, 11 at night. I work evening from 3-11 and did not know. It kills me to find that out. Also, that she has been feeding hot dogs and burgers as a main meal everyday. She is dirty, his clothes are dirty and not looked after properly. On the day that we split, she left him alone till 10.30pm and was with the guy again. I dont even think he know of him.

I really dont know how to explain myself right now. I am in such a state that I wonder if it all was my fault. I know my hours were bad but never expected this. I had a feeling for a long time but allways thought it was just in my head. Clearly not and after 20 years I get this.

Allot has happened since and wondered if I done the right thing today. Also I think I should involve a family solicitor as this is twisted but I cant afford one as I declared myself bankrupt so that we could start afresh. Can Anyone advise me?

Many thanks in advance.
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