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Old 12th October 2010, 06:59 PM   #1
Hopefull1983
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 135
Need a pick me up..

Hi All,

Hope you're all ok.

I'm having a down day today. Struggling to come to terms with everything that has happened over the past year and how much my husband has changed. Feeling like everything is starting to get on top of me and like I'm being punished for something really bad. Basically I'm feeling very sorry for myself and need some words of wisdom to snap out of it please....Thanks in advance.

Natalia. x
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"Love is more than three words mumbled before bedtime. Love is sustained by action, a pattern of devotion in the things we do for each other every day." - Nicholas Sparks

I don't wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone.
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Old 12th October 2010, 07:28 PM   #2
Wiggle
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Re: Need a pick me up..

Hi Hopeful,

Just to say you summed up how I've been feeling today. Maybe it's the change of season... time is moving on but I feel like I've gone back a couple of paces.

I'm using 'It will be all right, it will get better' as a bit of an affirmation tonight.

Next year isn't that far away, and it's GOT to be better than this one!

Axx
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Old 12th October 2010, 08:44 PM   #3
Hopefull1983
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 135
Re: Need a pick me up..

Thanks A.

I'm sorry you're feeling rubbish too. Hope tomorrow is a better day for us both. And yes, I totally agree, I'm well and truly looking forward to buying a bottle of champagne to wave goodbye to this year and say hello to what will hopefully be a better year! x
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"Love is more than three words mumbled before bedtime. Love is sustained by action, a pattern of devotion in the things we do for each other every day." - Nicholas Sparks

I don't wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone.
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Old 13th October 2010, 01:11 PM   #4
Raymond
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Re: Need a pick me up..

Why are you being punished for something bad Natalia? You of all people? You have been exemplary in your dealings about your marriage so there is no room for condemnation of yourself so I would question the source of where this is coming from? Certainly not from God.
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Old 13th October 2010, 01:18 PM   #5
chosen
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Re: Need a pick me up..

I agree with Raymond, who do you think is punishing you, and for what?
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Old 17th October 2010, 05:32 PM   #6
Hopefull1983
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Re: Need a pick me up..

Sorry guys, just a bad day the other day and feeling sorry for myself. I guess days like that tend to make me wonder why bad things happen to good people. It just seems endless the pain just when I think it's starting to get easier something always happens which brings me right back down to earth and the pain hits me again like a ton of bricks.
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"Love is more than three words mumbled before bedtime. Love is sustained by action, a pattern of devotion in the things we do for each other every day." - Nicholas Sparks

I don't wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone.
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Old 17th October 2010, 06:24 PM   #7
Helen_uk
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Re: Need a pick me up..

Don't beat yourself up Hopefull . Bad things happen to ALL people.

3 years down the line from my split with the ex and despite being happy with someone else , I still have the odd down day where I go back over what happened and feel a pang of pain over the way I was treated . On the whole time does make things less painful but it doesn't erase everything .

Big hugs for you and no need for apologies.
xx
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Old 17th October 2010, 09:45 PM   #8
Raymond
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Re: Need a pick me up..

It was an awful thing to happen to you Natalia. That you are still getting blowbacks shows the enormity of the tearing and the destruction of something that was good. However you have shown that you can have lots of good days but the scar will always be there deep down as it is a part of your life and will affect you sometimes. Marriage breakups are big things and part of your healing will be your inner acknowledgment of that. It's no quick fix as much as we would want it to be. Marriage is precious and you are one that has a rare insight and appreciation of what faithfulness is. It turned out that it was onesided and your husband thought differently. I pray that you will meet someone suitable who also values faithfulness as you do.
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Old 17th October 2010, 09:53 PM   #9
jools
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Re: Need a pick me up..

Hi Hopefull - and hi Helen! Helen and I were going through our dark days together on here 3 years ago - actually it was 4 years ago! I'd just like to echo what Helen said. I've been with someone new for 3 years now. It takes a long time. It's only now that I'm feeling that this relationship is "the norm". I used to feel that it wasn't right because he wasn't my girls' dad -- or my husband come to that! And the poor man (the new one) put up with so much due to my agonising. But you do shake off those feelings. 4 years down the line and I no longer get pangs of anything to do with my ex. I feel liberated, happy and in control of my life. Until very recently though I could have such sadness wash over me and reduce me to tears - though nowhere as often or as intense as in the early days.
Quote:
Next year isn't that far away, and it's GOT to be better than this one!
And it will be Wiggle - and the one after that will be even better! What you're going through is so normal and to be expected - but it will pass.
Jools XXX
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