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Old 4th December 2013, 06:19 PM   #1
LibraLady
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Threesome?

Hello,

I am curious to know what you all think of having a threesome with your spouse if that was something that you both felt would make your sex life better. I had a threesome when I was single just to quench a fantasy I had and after that I was done with it.

My husband and his first wife would have threesomes with a bi-sexual young lady on occasions and it seemed to be okay for them.

I have seen threesomes go really bad. Anyone experience this good or bad?
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Old 4th December 2013, 07:59 PM   #2
ronnoco
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Re: Threesome?

LibraLady,

A threesome will not solve the problems you have with your husband - it will simply lead to your second divorce.

It may seem like a good idea but it's not. It will only end in heart ache. You are a mother with a child. You must try to make your marriage work for the sake of your child. This will not help your husbands erectile problems long time, it will just destroy your family.

I'm sure you are thinking of this threesome as a quick fix to satisfy your sexual needs. How will you feel if your husband has no problems performing with someone else but then not when you are involved? - how is this going to help? - it will make everything 100 times worse.

You gave some good advice on Andrews post....you need to start following your own logic and not lust. Just because your husband will probably agree to this doesn't mean it's a good thing to do to help with your problems. I guarantee you it's not.

Last edited by ronnoco; 4th December 2013 at 08:08 PM.
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Old 4th December 2013, 08:45 PM   #3
LibraLady
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Re: Threesome?

Ronnoco, my husband asked me if that was what I wanted and I declined. I only want him and vise versa. I have been heeding the advice of all. I was just curious what other's experiences have been. I know for myself that I could not stomach seeing my husband make love to another person.
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Old 4th December 2013, 10:48 PM   #4
chosen
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Re: Threesome?

Bringing anyone else into a marriage is a dreadful idea. Faithfulness is vital in a marriage, after all that's what we promise when we get married, that we will be faithful. I would be devastated if my husband asked me that, on the other hand I wouldn't even consider marrying a guy who had done that before and thought it was ok.
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Old 5th December 2013, 10:50 AM   #5
ronnoco
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Re: Threesome?

OK, fair enough...question then - did your husband mention if it would be another man or another woman?

If man - he's thinking about your needs, if women, he's thinking about his.

Either way, it's not good.
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Old 5th December 2013, 07:20 PM   #6
Roses
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Re: Threesome?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ronnoco View Post

If man - he's thinking about your needs, if women, he's thinking about his.
Will you explain this?

Thanks.
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Old 5th December 2013, 07:43 PM   #7
ronnoco
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Re: Threesome?

I think a man wanting to bring a women into a threesome is doing so because he wants that other girl for his own pleasure. I personally know someone who wants to have this as he would love to watch the 2 girls together. Other men will want to have sex with that other women. This is why the man generally wants a threesome.

I can't think of a man wanting to bring another man in for his own pleasure (unless bi-sexual) So, if her husband was suggesting another man - it would be a way of saying let's have a threesome to "keep you happy" as he has erectile problems, etc...boost their sex life as he knows how unhappy she is.

Last edited by ronnoco; 5th December 2013 at 11:21 PM.
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Old 5th December 2013, 08:10 PM   #8
LibraLady
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Re: Threesome?

Well, he was asking if I wanted another woman in our bed.

In his previous marriage, they had threesomes and then his then-wife would also go off with that other woman and they would have relations (woman-woman). I was thinking, holy crap when he told me that and he was okay with that arrangement.....
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Old 5th December 2013, 08:11 PM   #9
LibraLady
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Re: Threesome?

So, do you all feel like its cheating if the wife is with another woman?
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Old 5th December 2013, 10:08 PM   #10
chosen
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Re: Threesome?

If the wife or husband is with another woman or man sexually, its adultery, even if one or both wanted it.
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Old 5th December 2013, 10:09 PM   #11
chosen
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Re: Threesome?

Quote:
Originally Posted by LibraLady View Post
Well, he was asking if I wanted another woman in our bed.

In his previous marriage, they had threesomes and then his then-wife would also go off with that other woman and they would have relations (woman-woman). I was thinking, holy crap when he told me that and he was okay with that arrangement.....

Wow did he tell you this before you married or after? I would have run a mile from a guy who did that and thought it was ok.
Did they divorce or did she die?

Why not ask him how he would feel if you had another man in the bed with the two of you. Strange how many men are happy for a three some with 2 women, but when it comes to another man having sex with their wife, suddenly they don't want it.

I cant think of much worse than my husband wanting to act that way.
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Old 5th December 2013, 11:19 PM   #12
ronnoco
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Re: Threesome?

Quote:
Originally Posted by chosen View Post
Why not ask him how he would feel if you had another man in the bed with the two of you. Strange how many men are happy for a three some with 2 women, but when it comes to another man having sex with their wife, suddenly they don't want it.
That was exactly why I asked the question earlier - as suspected, it's all for his pleasure.

Perhaps he thinks that seeing some girl on girl action will help with his erection problems, perhaps it will on the night but absolutely not going to help your situation in the slightest.

I find it a very odd suggestion for someone suffering from erectile dysfunction. I would have suspected people interested in threesomes to be very sexually active/confident.
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Old 6th December 2013, 10:55 AM   #13
chosen
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Re: Threesome?

Quote:
Originally Posted by ronnoco View Post
That was exactly why I asked the question earlier - as suspected, it's all for his pleasure.

Perhaps he thinks that seeing some girl on girl action will help with his erection problems, perhaps it will on the night but absolutely not going to help your situation in the slightest.

I find it a very odd suggestion for someone suffering from erectile dysfunction. I would have suspected people interested in threesomes to be very sexually active/confident.
It may be that he finds it hard to get an erection in a normal one man on one women relationship, because he is so used to distorted/dysfunctional sex and probably porn use, where he sees this sort of thing all the time. He now needs that to get erect.
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Old 6th December 2013, 01:41 PM   #14
Raymond
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Re: Threesome?

I agree. ED is often the result of porn because of a diversion of the sex deive. I seriously wonder what he is feeding on to suggest such an outlandish thing in a marriage. Intimacy should only be between the couple in my view and anything interfering in this whether it be porn, threesomes or an affair will hit negatively at the centre of the marriage.
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Old 6th December 2013, 02:12 PM   #15
Roses
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Re: Threesome?

I'm not sure what percentage of men contemplate (having fantasies) and eventually fall for this type of activity. 50%? I see 80% in some studies. How true that is, I really don't know.

Am I correct when I read that 50% of marriage would fail due to infidelity?
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