My husband has gotten to be close friends with a woman at work. So close that they were spending every smoke break together and a co-worker of my husband's whom I am also friends noticed and commented that they were spending a lot of time together.
He talked about her problems constantly. Mostly her marrital problems. I started to get uncomfortable hearing that she was confiding so much in him about something so personal. He told me that the reason he told me the stories was because he felt like I didn't appreciate him and he wanted me to see what a bad husband and father is like.
I started to take classes on my computer at night and needed time alone to work on my computer. He took my daughter to the school behind our house to play. The work "friend" only lives around the block from us and near the school. I found out she was going there when he was there so her son could play with our daughter.
My husband would get all happy and excited and couldn't wait to get to the school to be with this woman. He even took our daughter over to the school when I didn't need to do school work.
Than he invited her to the house for a cook out. He invited her husband too. Her husband couldn't make it so she and her son came without him.
Her and I stated talking and she seemed to make an effort to be nice to me. She also seemed really disappointed when she found out that I was the one cooking dinner.
While I was talking to her my husband was hovering over us like he didn't really want me to talk to her.
After we ate lunch we came in and watched TV. She didn't seem to want to leave and my husband didn't want her to leave.
He went outside for a smoke and motioned for her to come out. She did and the two of them went way out to the back yard and sat on the bench together leaving me in the house with the two kids! I thought that was very inappropriate for him to do that!
I told him that it was nice that her and I got along. He said that he was surprised and thought I wouldn't like her. Why have her over the house than? Was he trying to show me someone else was interested in him?
I could see that they have an attraction for each other.
I confronted him about it and he said he was attracted to her and that he enjoyed her company because she understands him and he can talk to her about anything! Excuse me, but I thought that I was supposed to be the only one he confided in!
I told him I felt that the friendship was inappropriate and made me feel uncomforable. He told me that he won't leave me for her.
I told him I did not want him to see her or talk to her outside of work.
He seemed angry but accepted it.
This was back in May.
He continued to talk to her at work. I kept telling him that I didn't like the friendship but he still continued to talk to her.
Finally I had enough and told him that I don't want him talking to her any more and I want him to end the friendship.
He got angry with me. I know he was still talking to her too because her number showed up on his cell phone. He told me she never called his cell. Why lie about it?
I thought it was all over and that he wasn't talking to her but now I am not so sure.
If she is just a co-worker friend than why would he invest so much of himself with her? Why would he lie to me about talking to her? Why can't he end the friendship?
He as acted suspicously all along not wanting to share her with me. She really did not want to try to be friends with me either. It's like they are hiding something.
I can't get it through his head that he should not have such a close female friend, that it is wrong. He says I am just a jealous bitch.
I can't get him to understand how I feel! What should I do?