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20th August 2015, 12:44 PM
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#196
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
Just been speaking to my wife about this. She has had three miscarriages. Same as yours? One of them was after the first so it was two before the first. We had names ready for them but they never came. We did think a lot about who they were but some things one cannot understand. We had to leave it with God. I cannot think of any reason why they would not be with God now.
Once we had the first the disappointments were put behind us. One of the reasons put down by the medical was the travelling to work on the train so when she became pregnant again we arranged that she stopped work and then had the baby. She had another miscarriage after the first before the second came. Although we were prayed for we also looked at the practical implications of travelling and work pressure which for Sue was a lot because of train connections etc.
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20th August 2015, 02:41 PM
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#197
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
Goodness Raymond I never heard of that as a reason for a miscarriage! When expecting my first, I had a very long journey to work consisting of a 20 mins walk to the station, followed by a train journey, followed by a bus or tube journey and then another 20 min walk the other end. This was to London which was very busy. I did that till I was 29-30 weeks pregnant.
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20th August 2015, 03:12 PM
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#198
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Guest
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
She won't say, but I feel she's afraid to find out, like if it's something that could have been prevented, but like I said, she doesn't smoke, barely drinks, doesn't do drugs, thyriod is fine, weight is fine, health wise she's normal.
I have never heard of travel, never been told it might have been travel. That is very interesting though.
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20th August 2015, 04:50 PM
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#199
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
The things is that if its something she can do to help prevent it the next time then its surely worth finding out? I am not sure that most miscarriages are caused by the things you mentioned such as drinking or being overweight or smoking, but usually by more medical things that cant be helped.
I do know that for slightly later miscarriages, those in the second 3 months, the cause can be that the cervix begins to open prematurely, and a stitch can be put in to prevent that happening, but hers were earlier than this.Nearly all miscarriages that happen in the first 3 months are due to problems with the foetus. Have they checked her eggs? Your sperm?
To be honest, I doubt the travelling thing is actually a valid reason, millions of women travel to work each day and dont have miscarriages, it may be they were guessing at a reason because they didnt know.
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20th August 2015, 04:53 PM
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#200
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
Misconceptions about miscarriage
An increased risk of miscarriage is not linked to:
a mother's emotional state during pregnancy, such as being stressed or depressed
having a shock or fright during pregnancy
exercise during pregnancy – but discuss with your GP or midwife what type and amount of exercise is suitable for you during pregnancy
lifting or straining during pregnancy
working during pregnancy – or work that involves sitting or standing for long periods
having sex during pregnancy
travelling by air
eating spicy food
Doesnt look as if travel or working is a cause.
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20th August 2015, 05:01 PM
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#201
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Guest
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
I don't think her eggs have been checked, no.
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20th August 2015, 08:20 PM
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#202
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jaxon
I don't think her eggs have been checked, no.
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That may be the next step. It may not be that her body is doing something that miscarries a healthy baby, but it may be that the baby is damaged in some way and not compatable with life therefore it is lost.
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21st August 2015, 09:52 AM
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#203
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
Quote:
Originally Posted by chosen
Goodness Raymond I never heard of that as a reason for a miscarriage! When expecting my first, I had a very long journey to work consisting of a 20 mins walk to the station, followed by a train journey, followed by a bus or tube journey and then another 20 min walk the other end. This was to London which was very busy. I did that till I was 29-30 weeks pregnant.
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I know Chosen. Everyone is different. That is what we were advised. This was in London too. It does affect some perhaps. Something to do with the fluid in high speed journeys I think they said.
How old is your wife jaxon?
Last edited by Raymond; 21st August 2015 at 10:39 AM.
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21st August 2015, 10:32 AM
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#204
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
There is no medical reason why a pregnant woman should not travel. Nevertheless there can be exceptions for certain people such as the following, although it cannot be proved.
Has anyone noticed their miscarriage happening right after a long drive? I had my second miscarriage this weekend and I put together a little conclusion, here it goes... So, last June, we decide to take our pup to the beach to celebrate our new baby on the way. On the way home, I started spotting. That lead to heavier bleeding then loosing tissue, clots then ultimately, my baby. Ok so then, last Monday, we find out were expecting again. Because of an emergency, we had to go to San Luis obispo to visit a relative in ICU. Right before leaving to come back home I used the toilet and noticed blood. From that moment on, it was the exact same as my first miscarriage.
I have a strong feeling that my little baby was trying to embed itself into my uterus and the long drive caused my babys to fall out. Both times, I was about 4 weeks,but according to actual conception date, I was about 2 weeks, which is right during implantation time.
Please pass this info on and please remember, No traveling in at least the first few weeks. It's really sad to know what may have caused these losses, however, it does give hope that maybe we now know what we need to do differently. Good luck to all and God bless.
The things I could have done different, If I only would have known...
I don't know you guys... I really do think this was it. I've got 3 brats already and hobby and I are mid 20's and healthy. And I think all the bouncing and hills from the mountains.... It was the same exact drive and the same exact time. Both was the very week I found out, which was the same week I SHOULD have started. After speaking to the doctor, she said it could have very well been the drive since the first two weeks is the most critical. It is likely that the bouncing made it hard to attach itself. I mainly want to send out a precaution. I myself, will NEVER travel in the beginning of pregnancy. I do believe this was my cause. Especially the feeling I got when we figured it out, it was like God letting me know I had my answer. Everyone in the room felt it... His presence... It was like he whispered in our ears.
I know this might be quite rare and don't want to make a rule of it as it probably is nothing to do with that, but I thought it was interesting. We are leaving no stone unturned are we not?
Also my wife wants to pray for you about this. Can you give permission for this?
Also you could have her eggs checked as Chosen suggested. Don't leave that out. It can't be your sperm count as she was actually pregnant.
Last edited by Raymond; 21st August 2015 at 10:38 AM.
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21st August 2015, 11:56 AM
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#205
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 5,794
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raymond
There is no medical reason why a pregnant woman should not travel. Nevertheless there can be exceptions for certain people such as the following, although it cannot be proved.
Has anyone noticed their miscarriage happening right after a long drive? I had my second miscarriage this weekend and I put together a little conclusion, here it goes... So, last June, we decide to take our pup to the beach to celebrate our new baby on the way. On the way home, I started spotting. That lead to heavier bleeding then loosing tissue, clots then ultimately, my baby. Ok so then, last Monday, we find out were expecting again. Because of an emergency, we had to go to San Luis obispo to visit a relative in ICU. Right before leaving to come back home I used the toilet and noticed blood. From that moment on, it was the exact same as my first miscarriage.
I have a strong feeling that my little baby was trying to embed itself into my uterus and the long drive caused my babys to fall out. Both times, I was about 4 weeks,but according to actual conception date, I was about 2 weeks, which is right during implantation time.
Please pass this info on and please remember, No traveling in at least the first few weeks. It's really sad to know what may have caused these losses, however, it does give hope that maybe we now know what we need to do differently. Good luck to all and God bless.
The things I could have done different, If I only would have known...
I don't know you guys... I really do think this was it. I've got 3 brats already and hobby and I are mid 20's and healthy. And I think all the bouncing and hills from the mountains.... It was the same exact drive and the same exact time. Both was the very week I found out, which was the same week I SHOULD have started. After speaking to the doctor, she said it could have very well been the drive since the first two weeks is the most critical. It is likely that the bouncing made it hard to attach itself. I mainly want to send out a precaution. I myself, will NEVER travel in the beginning of pregnancy. I do believe this was my cause. Especially the feeling I got when we figured it out, it was like God letting me know I had my answer. Everyone in the room felt it... His presence... It was like he whispered in our ears.
I know this might be quite rare and don't want to make a rule of it as it probably is nothing to do with that, but I thought it was interesting. We are leaving no stone unturned are we not?
Also my wife wants to pray for you about this. Can you give permission for this?
Also you could have her eggs checked as Chosen suggested. Don't leave that out. It can't be your sperm count as she was actually pregnant.
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I believe that sometimes the sperm can be damaged as can the eggs.
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21st August 2015, 06:43 PM
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#206
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Guest
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
She's 28, and if you're wife wants to, I don't mind. But thanks for asking, I've never had anyone do that before.
Also, that travel is curious. I've never heard of it before, but I'll have to think. We've taken a lot of trips before, many of them long ones, and she's always going out of town to pick up things, but mainly my being curious, I'll try to see if any of that matches up.
The egg checking will be the hard part. Getting her to agree, that's going to be a challenge, though I think ultimately she will, especially if it can promise an actual answer. I have seen home tests, but I don't think I can trust that!
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22nd August 2015, 10:41 AM
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#207
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
Okay Jaxon my wife (and me) will pray for your wife and the situation. Who knows what God will do.
Meanwhile it is a good thing to try and find answers if you can. Checking your wife's eggs seems a logical step as that hasn't been done before. I've never heard of damaged sperm before but if that's checkable why not. She wouldn't need to know.
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24th August 2015, 06:49 PM
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#208
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Guest
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
I'm not sure I'd want to do something behind her back, but I'll consider it myself. She did say she'd think about getting her eggs checked, I guess that's better than a no.
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26th August 2015, 10:09 AM
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#209
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
I meant she doesn't need to know, but that's up to you of course. I thought it would save her more hassle to think about. It's good that she is willing to have her eggs checked. One can go a long way by doing just little things at a time. Being overwhelmed doesn't help anyone.
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26th August 2015, 03:10 PM
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#210
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Guest
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Re: Wife and I have not been intimate in months.
Being overwhelmed is putting it mildly I think. It is nice to see her coming around to something, but she just still isn't herself.
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