I fear I'm to late, please help

[William1]

Hello all and thank you for taking the time to read this.
This is a 7 year story of how I took advantage of my wife because I didn't want to grow up.
we met at Wal-Mart working night shift and it all took off extremely fast, we started dating on 10/15/2009 and I moved in with her shortly after that but I had a dark side that I didn't let go of. I was still messing around with one of my EXes and I was lying to my future wife about it. And to this day I'm still sneaking around although we moved 1500miles away from there. We got married on 5/15/2013 but she still didn't know the truth, I've had a porn addiction ever since I was a teen and she wants me to cut that down to a minimal, I've started a career in truck driving and I've had a couple of hookers, I have a Hugh anger problem. I finally started to make an effort 2 months ago, I stopped the sleeping around, I gave up facebook the internet, I was trying to make more time for her and the kids (hard to do only being home one day a week) and everything seemed like it was healing, then our anniversary 5th almost 7yrs, we went out for a nice dinner and everything was great, we went home watched a movie it had a strip club scene in it so she covered my eyes, I got upset and said I'm almost 30 I should be able to watch whatever I want, she stormed off and instead of doing the right thing and just telling her I'm sorry and talking about it my anger got the best of me and I yelled at her. We have been fighting about this and everything I've done for the last 7yrs for 2 weeks now and last Monday she filed the divorce paper.

Anyone have any ideas what I could do to stop the divorce and take better care of her, I love her to death and I don't want to lost her.

Sorry it's a long post. Thank you for reading and any and all advise will be great fully welcomed.

[Raymond]

I think you know what to do. That is apologise to her for your hard words. To have a good marriage one cannot mess around with other women. That is adultery as you know. Even porn is mental adultery and can have the same effect. Porn is featured in 50% of divorces these days and can be a killer of marriage which requires sexual faithfulness. I don't think it is fair to your wife to watch striptease whether she is there or not. I know you are having a battle but it is a battle you need to win for the sake of your marriage.

Have a look at the dvd Fireproof. It might help you. The main thing now is to apologise and take back those words. Yes you can watch whatever you want but some of that stuff is poison to your marriage. You have to choose really between your lust and her. She is the one you should be lusting after and you need to cultivate that.

[Grace Sidberry]

Originally Posted by William1

Hello all and thank you for taking the time to read this.
This is a 7 year story of how I took advantage of my wife because I didn't want to grow up.
we met at Wal-Mart working night shift and it all took off extremely fast, we started dating on 10/15/2009 and I moved in with her shortly after that but I had a dark side that I didn't let go of. I was still messing around with one of my EXes and I was lying to my future wife about it. And to this day I'm still sneaking around although we moved 1500miles away from there. We got married on 5/15/2013 but she still didn't know the truth, I've had a porn addiction ever since I was a teen and she wants me to cut that down to a minimal, I've started a career in truck driving and I've had a couple of hookers, I have a Hugh anger problem. I finally started to make an effort 2 months ago, I stopped the sleeping around, I gave up facebook the internet, I was trying to make more time for her and the kids (hard to do only being home one day a week) and everything seemed like it was healing, then our anniversary 5th almost 7yrs, we went out for a nice dinner and everything was great, we went home watched a movie it had a strip club scene in it so she covered my eyes, I got upset and said I'm almost 30 I should be able to watch whatever I want, she stormed off and instead of doing the right thing and just telling her I'm sorry and talking about it my anger got the best of me and I yelled at her. We have been fighting about this and everything I've done for the last 7yrs for 2 weeks now and last Monday she filed the divorce paper.

Anyone have any ideas what I could do to stop the divorce and take better care of her, I love her to death and I don't want to lost her.

Sorry it's a long post. Thank you for reading and any and all advise will be great fully welcomed.

Hi William,

I agree that the best thing for you to do is to apologize, sincerely. It is also important to let her know that you realize that you have a problem with porn and that you are willing to get some help. You may want to consider a support group where you will have accountability as you try to work on this issue. Your marriage is worth the effort.

All the best,

[Raymond]

Thank you for that Grace.