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Old 31st January 2012, 04:38 PM   #1
jan2012
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Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 22
brink of seperation

hi
i hope you can give me some support/advice. hubby and i been married 3 years, been through illness, work difficulties etc. our marriage has always had problems - and we have just lost respect for each other. every few days things go ok and then there is a complete fall out which could last a few days and it means i can't cope as i am so worn down - i get depressed, cancel my plans, can't get on with my life anymore. i have moved to my parents a few times when this has happened - it happened a few days ago and i said that was it im moving out - we have just started counselling together but i still don't really want to live together during this process but have decided to give it one more chance. my mental health is affected by the arguments, plus to add to the mix i have a new baby to look after and don't want this affecting her. i don't know what to do. he wants us to go on holiday together to get a break. in the circumstances, would this not be a recipie for disaster? i cannot stand when he is off work, i can't relax in my own house,things are full of tension. the things that led up to this was my own illness and depression, us not having a social life together, his break down over work difficulties and loss of respect - also 2 completely different family dynamics. he never gives me space when i need it for ecample if we are argueing and i say we need to drop this and talk about it later he will follow me from room to room if i close the door he will open it and go on and on till he has got his point out / anger out and i am reduced to a crying mess or in a state of anxiety which affects me for a long time afterwards. i have already said ive had enough. many times. now i feel stupid i am being persuaded to go home - and i need to, i need my own space my own house my own surroundings, but i also need to get a new place of my own for ahwile - would separation not be good for awhile as we are destroying each other. its so hard. tomorrow we have a counselling appointment. i am looking after a demanding baby and to be honest all this is draining me so much. by the way, we are both born again christians....the devil has had it out for us from the start!
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