how to tell when its over
I last posted on here 7th feb,about my partner 'text cheat'who was texting my brother's girlfriend behind my back!Things are really bad for me at the minute.I'm so unsure if i want to be with him,i don't know if i love him,I'm no help to him i wind him up by asking if he is certain nothing went on between them.I cannot help it, He gets so mad about it that last night he smashed his mobile up.He says things like 'why am i not hiding from your brother?''why am i happy?''why would i do something like that with her?''Do i look worried about anything?'
He is such a loving,caring,attentive father now to our 2 kids that i'd feel wicked if i ended it.My daughter was in such a state last time she is only 5 i feel i couldn't do it to her.I was a mess last time we split but had to hold it together for the kids and im also worried if we did that he would take his life,has he was in such a state last time that he said to my mum he felt like driving at high speed into a wall.
I feel i don't want to be near him,i care about him but unsure if i love him.And the worst thing is he has changed for the better,he is everything i could want in a man but then i remember what he has done.I would love to make it work,we have grown up together im 23,hes 25 we've been with each other for 10yrs.I feel so empty,should i take some time out to think about my feelings?
The most confusing thing is i don't know what i want or how i really feel.
please any advice would be great