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Old 25th February 2012, 11:26 PM   #5
1aokgal
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Re: bipolar, an affair and baby!

I think there is a misunderstanding. He was not married to her at the time he was with the OW. He was seeing BOTH women. It is likely he lived with our poster when he got the OW pregnant. He told his fiance..now his wife...that there was another woman and she then a few months pregnant. That was three months before they actually got married. She married him anyway. The OW woman had not yet delivered the baby. He married this lady and abandoned the pregnant woman with whom he had the affair. (Of course, he was involved with both women at the same time, so both thought their realtionship was monogamous.) Her family stepped in to help their pregnant daughter. It is pretty clear why they now want little to do with him.

Then he forced a DNA test when he challenged the paternity because of the child support requested. He told his fiance, before they married, it was his child. She got pregant while they were together. So he compartmentalized neatly between these two women. She married him, knowing all this. He must be a real charmer to have kept two women in the dark! He told his wife about the woman and her pregnancy three months before they married, if my timeline is correct.

He left the woman pregant and married his fiance. A real catch! He obviously had not told the OW about his fiance. He also had not told his fiance about the woman until she was pregant. Two women, and each thought they were the one. That is why, his now wife, should not consider having a child for several years. Bi-polar. without or with meds, has nothing to do with infidelity, dishonesty and lack of character or empathy in these events. Surprising to me, is why she chose to marry him!

He owes this child and that mother help. He didn't do the right thing. He should take responsibility, not with just money, but some input. That does not threaten his wife...unless she makes it a threat. After all, he married her and abandoned a pregant woman. Personally, I would not have taken this man on a bet! His present wife sees something in him, not apparent here. She should be charitable enough to care that this child gets some input more than money. I would never trust this man to do the right thing.

I am curious who provided the medical and prenatal care for the woman and baby? Many women do not have coverage on any insurance policy that covers delivery and care. Birth and prenatal are not provided free, and it is very expensive. Since he was out of there, it must have been a burden on her family.

I think this wife feels threatened by this poor little baby. Too bad she could not feel sympathy and input some caring about these events. She should extend herself to do that. She would never regret being kind there. Her problem is with him, not with the OW or the baby. No child should be discarded like a wet dishcloth.

Last edited by 1aokgal; 26th February 2012 at 01:06 AM.
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