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Old 25th December 2011, 05:56 PM   #153
1aokgal
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Re: Do I have any hope?

I'm sorry. Why is it your responsibility to go through a SHAM week, while he entertains his daughter in your home! You are supposed to "'play act marital normalcy" to cloak his acts? Why do that? I say it would be FAR better to "uninvite" the girl and the bad timing of this bad marriage now.

She is HIS responsibility, and not your responsibility. He should have figured that his BAD actions hurt others, including his family and how they view his actions. You should not enter into that charade to cover up his attempt to create a normal scene. His relatives/family will deal with his actions how they will. Univite the girl and wish her a nice holiday at her mothers'. The best thing for you is to get him GONE and as fast as that can be accomplished you will get a chance at a life ahead.

Or you can fix/repair that disaster for the girl so she can think he is an OK dad/husband. That will last for a week? Month? Year? Take your pick. Then he wants to go find another womans' home and heart to move into next. This man is VERY bad news.

Dear lady, make him HISTORY. Tell him to call the daughter and break the news you have other plans for the next couple weeks. He can deal with it..he made the problems.

Make this time a time of leace for yourself. Make an appointment for yourself at a local spa to have a massage. Get a pedicure, facial and day of rest and beauty. schedule a lovely lunch with a supportive friend. Don't talk about him but what you see ahead for yourself. Go call a counselling service and get in to see someone you can talk to about these events. Think about a life without nasty complications.....HIM. spend time to make this Christmas one to analyze your life and how you see the future ahead that you will put this sad time behind.

About the presents...graciously accept that he owes you a few years of your life back. Nothing he bought means a hill of beans for what he showed you that his love comes and goes with the wind. Ask his other EX-wives what were their dealings like with this man? He seems made of clay. He will blow away anytime when you might need him most. He seems a man of supreme selfishness.

Don't waste your life. Life is too short to waste much of it on this mistake. While he sleeps down the hall, will you try to entice him to be a man...a husband? I sure hope not. I think you are far too valuable to throw yourself away here. Sadly, I have a feeling you will hang on and regret doing that, and he might stay awhile for what he gains. Does he gain in property or means from this marriage? How well did you know him before this marriage?
Is there an age difference here? I have a feeling he moves on when the novelty is past. I also wonder what he gains? Do you have any idea what he might gain?

Last edited by 1aokgal; 25th December 2011 at 06:46 PM.
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