Thread: Help!!
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Old 17th October 2011, 12:36 PM   #12
Helen_uk
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 1,531
Re: Help!!

Hunny,

I was in this kind of destructive relationship for 5 years . I loved him, I made excuses for him. He never changed.

Without remorse on their part there is no way to move forward. My ex was full of excuses, he blamed me for checking up on him, he thought saying sorry was good enough- and then just kept on doing it.

Like your H he was a lovely guy on the outside , but inside him there was this constant need for the thrill of the chase . He had a dark , secret side that I got to see and I didn't like . I couldn't trust him. Without trust what's left.... ?

If he can't admit to what he's done, how can he show remorse ? Until someone accepts they've done wrong there is no way to work on things.

Eventually I discovered I valued my own peace of mind more than I loved him.

I think you need to stay calm, present him with the evidence you have and see what he has to say for himself. If he shows anger then I'm sorry , but I think your marriage is over.

You deserve better than this.
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