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Old 26th May 2009, 01:42 PM   #6
Raymond
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
Re: Sexless Marriage falling to pieces.....

This is almost certainly her problem from childhood Marky. I was brought up as an orphan and I know what I am talking about. Theres a person in there that needs to come out. You get glimpses then she hides away again. This isn't you it's how she is. She needs to come out and share herself fully but I guess she is afraid. She has never learned to relate fully and the wounds of rejection from childhood cut deep. She wants to relate but feels the need to control the terms in case she gets hurt.

If she knew someone who fully loved her, someone she could fully trust, someone she could fear no rejection from and be totally accepted she would be healed. Alas none of us humans measure up to this although we can part of the time. I found it was only christ who measured up to this. That is my healing. It is all our healing if we did but know it.

I was speaking to two orphans the other day who were much older and they both confess this estrangement from people. They get by, put up a front but theres an isolation there underneath. Still there after all these years.

Your wife really needs help and healing and I don't think any psychologist is going to have the answer. The wounds of childhood are carried around until we are healed. I only know one answer I'm afraid.

Raymond
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