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Old 11th January 2011, 03:03 PM   #1
coolircrumble
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18 months after H affair what now?

It has been almosty a year since I have last posted on here and I am still in need of advice.
It is now 18 months since I found out about my H affair and things have not moved on very much which I feel is mostly my own fault.
I cannot seem to get past the hurt and the anger that has been caused by his affair.
My h has been making every effort to make me happy and doing every thing that he can to make me see that it is me and our marraige that he wants. He has had no contact with the ow since I confronted her and him.
So I feel I am in limbo, when I look at him i see a liar and a cheat. Before I found out what he had been up to I loved him and our life so much.
He said there was no reason for him to do what he did as nothing had changed at home but the opportunity arose and he took it instead of just saying no. If there wasn't a problem it might happen again!

I know that is my problem now as he has really really tried to make me happy but I dont know if that is what I want anymore. I have changed so much since then as he has, although he says he is still the same person and had only this one mental blip (his words) in 26 years of marraige.

Has anyone managed to get it back after this length of time and why am I still here is a question I ask myself a lot. I could financial manage with out him and our girls know everything that has happened and would accept whatever happens.
I know if I do not do anything we could carry on not being truely happy for months or even years.
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