[Raymond]

Thats the whole point of forgiveness Coolicrumble. You forgive following their repentance. If you are keeping in your mind punishment or judgment then it is not forgiveness. If you are going to do it you need to try and do it properly. He already knows it is wrong. You cannot play God. Don't worry about him suffering. He would have suffered believe me. At the moment he needs forgiveness and acceptance. We all do when we have got it wrong.

The christian principles are helpful in this which shows that christ paid the price for our sins which can be forgiven when we come to him on repentance. No we don't deserve it and God is a just God. Sin deserves punishment. But because God is love he has accepted his sons payment for our sins. I don't understand it but I accept it by faith and found that it is true.

What does God do when our sins are forgiven? He accepts us as if we had never sinned and wipes the slate clean.

This is a similar principle in your marriage. He doesn't deserve forgiveness. None of us do. But love has mercy where there is repentance. If you can do it for him you won't overly be condemning yourself when you have got it wrong but will be able to forgive yourself. Don't for the life of me worry about vengeance that belongs to God only as he has said.

Raymond