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I think its in his head but he is one of the most stubborn people ever and when he makes a decision he rarely backs down
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That is exactly like my wife, she never backs down, never has. If you look at my story, it's pretty much the same as yours, only mine turned out to have a not a very nice ending upon finding out the truth behind my 'then' problem. I believed everything that my wife told me but wish I'd looked at the whole situation from an outsiders point of view. You do need to focus more on yourself, I know what it's like to be totally put off food and to be unable to sleep, it's not at all nice, but nature did eventually take it's stand with me, forcing me to eat. I moved out of our marrital home and did eventually find that my life could and would go on without my wife, weather I wanted it to or not. As awfull as this may sound, is it definate that there is nobody else, I was 100% sure my wife was being faithfull, I believed she'd fallen out of love with me. It was only after I'd moved back in that the affair came to light. You honestly don't want to be self blamming, I think a lot of us on here have done plenty of that, and it gets you nowhere. I also think that feelings can't change as quick as what we've both been led to think, it's impossible. I'm probably not the best person to give anybody any kind of advice, as my head is currently still all over the place, but this place, as others say, is a canny place to vent you worries and a place to get your thoughts accross. Nobody can really help you with the problems you are facing but it's good to have people around that are willing to listen to what you have to say.
' Take care of yourself ' and good look.