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Old 17th March 2012, 07:41 AM   #25
Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 22
Re: brink of seperation

how are you Raymond, MC?
things have just got really bad with hubby and me. i don't know what to do. the marriage counselling was overwhelming - some of it helped, and sometimes it just felt like a place to accuse and hurt each other and opened a can of worms each time. she seemed to focus a lot on the negatives.

anyway the last time we were in he said he couldn't be bothered with it anymore - he is going to go back but the baby and me got sick after that so we haven't been back yet and things are so so hard.

he needs at LEAST one night out a week to stop him feeling down, this week he went out for dinner on monday night but that was 'only 2 hours' and i asked him not to do his night out later in the week as the baby and me weren't well, and also i have had literally no sleep due to the baby for 2 weeks now as she has been going through a difficult stage. he stayed in, but i have received the brunt of it since.

he says he is not happy in the marriage, is bored cos we never go out, (we do, mostly at the weekends and maybe once during the week), feels he can't be himself (ie, take off whenever he wants to to do his own thing), needs to be around a lot of people all the time to stop him feeling down etc....he admits he is depressed at times but refuses to go to the doctor as he says its circumstantial depression, which he blames on my health problems, as i don't have enough energy to give him the lifesstyle he wants. he brings up things that i cannot do every single day - different limitations that i have, - when i tell him this really hurts me and brings me down, he says well it impacts and affects his life too. its all so very upsetting.

i feel that i have been giving all i can give to compromise on different things, to make him happy, to let him get his time out etc etc and nothing, nothing is ever good enough. i do not know where to go from here. we will not be able to get back to counselling for a few weeks as he has agreed to meet his college class then instead. i am so upset that i want nothing to do with him over this weekend - and yet i have to go on...
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