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Old 28th March 2012, 08:57 PM   #37
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
Re: brink of seperation

I'm tired now and may come back later Jan. Wednesday is my swimming night and I give it my all while I can.

Just to say it seems that you are classic extrovert and introvert. I am an introvert and understand where you are coming from. Extroverts get their energy from others. Introverts get it from being alone or downtime as you call it. It doesn't mean that one doesn't like people it just means you need time alone as well. We have to cope with the temperament we have. I can understand your husband a little better now. He will need people and get his energy from them whereas you will get it from being alone. I think understanding your temperaments will help here. The danger is that he might expect you to be an extrovert when you are not and try and make you be like him. It won't work because you are not made that way and he has to see it and accept it. You are not letting anyone down you have to be yourself. Yes there will be times that you can adjust a little but you will never be an extrovert. Both temperament have their advantages.

It's great that you are encouraging him. I think you are hitting on something here. It might well be his love language and he will feel love from it in a special way if it is. The book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman calls it words of affirmation.
Raymond is offline   Reply With Quote