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Old 9th July 2012, 09:35 AM   #75
sammie38
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Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 43
Re: How do I trust him again?

Hi everyone, I feel I'm only on here when something goes wrong and for that I apologise. I need some help please and I don't know what else to do. It's been over a year since I found out about my husband's EA but I still don't trust him and I don't seem to be any further on. I check his emails constantly and question him all the time as to who he is with and where he is when he's out with work and quite frankly it is driving both myself and my husband mad. He hasn't done anything that I know of to justify my insecurities and there is never anything in emails apart from work so why do I persist in checking? My husband asked me whether it was because, deep down, I don't want to be with him anymore and I am looking for a reason? This definitely isn't the case, I've thought about this myself and I know I don't want to separate from him. We had another row about this on Saturday night and then a long chat followed, understandably he is at the end of his patience with this and I need to know how to stop myself checking up on him and ultimately trying to control him which, after a great deal of thought, I think I must be trying to do. I think I read his emails because I want to know what he's doing and with whom, all of the time he's not with me, but why? He doesn't read my emails or question me all of the time. I think I am so scared of being hurt again I feel the need to control, which incidentally doesn't work and I know, in time, will only succeed in pushing him away. Any advice would be gratefully received, particularly if anyone has been through a similar situation. How did you learn to trust again?
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