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Old 26th August 2009, 09:19 PM   #96
crush
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Re: I am left devastated because he has left

Thanks MSC71 I am really trying to do just that, it is hard though I have to admit.

H came today with a full itinery up till 2011 of dates he wants the kids including sleepovers xmas times etc. I just was gobsmacked. I told him we have to be flexible with all of this, yes he can have kids every other saturday night for sleepovers I don't need it all put into writing I am not stupid. I feel it is again another way of control. He is telling me what weekends I can be free etc. Whilst I do not have a problem with him seeing the children, I have never stopped him once yet I feel that ow and him are setting my life for me and still feel he is dictating to me and I have to go along with all he says. I hate the way he makes me feel I want to be in control just a bit and feel I can make choices.

Whenever I say anything he just turns it around to make me feel like it is me that has the problem whereas if he could just "go with the flow" and make it more harmonious I am sure we would all be fine. I do try not to let him get to me in this way but he always does. I always feel like I it is him and ow against me and feel they always come out stronger. I long for the day when it is me telling him whats what and feeling more confident and in control of things. Just when I think I feel stronger he always manages to bring me down again and I just hate it.
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