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Old 12th February 2012, 02:00 PM   #20
Raymond
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,409
Re: brink of seperation

It is a well known thing that those who are good at certain thing are least patient with those who are not up to scratch on those things.

You are a bit like my wife actually Jan and I am a bit like your husband. I was guilty of not understanding and not being compassionate towards my wife. Women are different to men and it takes time to understand them. The scripture says we are to love them and live with them with understanding, so there is no excuse for us really. He will get to that place if he wants to and with God's help.

Actually I am not as strong as I thought I was and my wife displays qualities which are exceptional in the area of compassion and empathy. Empathy is her greatest gift and God uses her in that. That was underneath everything and the flip side was that she does have tears if I badly upset her which I hardly ever do these days.

You husband is being a bit cruel and unloving to be honest. I wouldn't say he does it on purpose. He just thinks he is right but he is not. We all have blind spots. The rule for a man is always to love their wives and he needs to see how he is being impatient and even controlling. I hope all these things come out in counselling. Arguments are not only about who is right or wrong. It matters how you treat the other. It is not loving not to allow you the time to process things and give you the space and love you need. He will learn these things in time if he is wanting to do the right thing like I had to.
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