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Old 20th September 2015, 05:48 PM   #35
Lindentree1
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Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 1,253
Re: Courage to leave my 11 year marriage

Quote:
Originally Posted by msjlhunter View Post
What's the RC church?

Where i come from religion isn't a big thing at all.. You can take it or leave it.

You know this weekend at home has just been how things used to be. It is kind of giving me second thoughts about leaving him.... I really, really do want to leave him but what if it's a big mistake and things aren't greener on the other side. I have reserved my new place to move in on Wednesday, my friend has already transferred the money into my bank for what i need to move in with but why do i now have these doubts in my mind?!?!?!
I think it's fear of the unknown, and totally normal. You have help and a place to stay, though, and I would take advantage of that. Just because he didn't threaten you one weekend don't mean he won't threaten or demean you again. I think you know he will. He may even use physical violence against you again. Then what?

You are still young and you can create a whole new life--it's right in front of you. You just have to take that step forward. You say you really want to leave him. Follow your instincts.

I know you were asking about forgiveness earlier. You will come a long way if you learn to forgive yourself for whatever it was you were talking about. Forgiving yourself can be an important step in healing. No one is perfect, but we hopefully learn as we grow and learn to make better choices for ourselves. But you have to feel you are worthy of making better choices.

Abuse (whether verbal or physical) is extremely damaging to one's self-image. You may not have a lot of confidence in yourself right now. That confidence will come when you are not around someone who constantly tears you down. You deserve better, in my opinion.

It's your decision. Please take care of yourself and keep posting here. You have support here.

Last edited by Lindentree1; 20th September 2015 at 06:29 PM.
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