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Old 5th August 2008, 07:46 PM   #12
ilakatilol
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 38
Re: Extreme PURE Hatred

Quote:
Originally Posted by 1aokgal View Post
It sounds as if somebody has TOO much time on their hands and feels sorry for themselves. Why not get a job and contribute and help to solve some problems or if time hangs heavy think about going back to school or doing positive things.

All that negativy. dislike and hatred (your word, not mine) seeps into your pores and poisons any joy you might have or new interest. If he is such a dud, why not stop being dependent and make your own way in the world. I am sure some other woman will take him.

One persons' trash is anothers' treasure. Maybe you don't know how good you have it until you lose it all? Nobody wants to be around a groveling, whining, sad sack who can't find her own things to do apart from his hobbies or his stuff. Sounds like you don't know what real problems are except the ones you build for yourself. Sorry the man has to have a dreary woman behind the door. You said you wished he had an affair?? I bet he does in time stop coming home to escape being there with you. You need help.

The guy will get tired of coming home to somebody who "hates" him. Perhaps he will tire of that and find a nice warm friendly person who cares about him. Bet you like his paychecks well enough?

Do you even like yourself? Perhaps you need to look into some help as in counseling or MEDS. There are so many who strugglle with serious illnesses and truly might have a reason to be glum and they encourage everyone around them.

Such a dose of selfishness in your postings and it does not all revolve around you. If there is a problem ..try to work it out or better yet..get out. Let the man have a chance with someone who cares about him and can be a partner. don't believe your own bombast that he"won't find someone" better than you. I bet he does pretty fast. There are a lot of women out there willing to carry their share and do it with a willing heart.

All that anger is just introjected into your own system and you become ill either mentally or physically. All that pity party you're having will age you and make you ugly. You will need giant bottles of BOTOX at 40. Lighten up, and get on the merry go round of living. It is a wonderful place to be. Yes, it takes courage to handle all the challenges. Life is not for quitters.
Good. You want him? He is all yours.
Look, I'll even attach his info & everything about him for you if you like. Swell?

I have a job still. I had a great job. He lost his while I was working full time & paying for health insurance & everything. Housing market crashes... my job was let go.

But you know what? Even when times are bad... I have a part time job right now. You think HE will appreciate that YOU took a part time min wage job just to help out working till 3 in the morn? Still have to cook, clean do all inside chores, outside shoppings for necessities everyday! To get what?

He comes home & blames me that I slept in from 3:30 till 10:30 (it only just happens in the last 2 weeks of so... my body just plain can't take it making him breakfast & waking every morn)... thats like 7 hrs? Which after i do full time chores till he came home for dinner, rides his bicycle for 3 hrs (everyday) i HAVE TO HEAD INTO WORK!!! And you know what he did from 8 till 2:30AM when I am gone??? NOTHING!!!!

He can come home & asked what I do all day besides sleep... what did he do all day that I am gone?

No... he did not even appreciate the fact that I am trying. While during his loss of job... he did not even try for the min-wage... he did not work period... and did not feed nor take care of the kid while locking himself in the computer room looking for his dream job (so he says). he is surfing.... always surfing & chatting w/ his buddies & who cares even if theres a woman or two in there)?

Oh... and he pride himself in "working his wife to the bone"... old polish saying. He'll expect you to do dishes even when your hands are bleeding from drying out (no dishwasher, since ours broke, he is too cheap to fix it 7 refuses to buy a new one). And when you leave dishes for him to do... he'll be more patient than you... leaving it for weeks to months till you do them (I do admit he's doing a bit more lately) meanwhile coming home & asking you what did you do all day (I hated that question day in & out... cringed at hearing it)?

Oh... plus with his job (in art & design)... you'd never expect to be a full time house wife... no way... dream on. But he expects YOU to work JUST LIKE one!

So.. you think I am lucky?
Wait till you are not getting any B'day gifts, Anniversaries, X'mas gifts, Mother's days gifts... etc. etc... not even a card or taking u out to lunch for those days... flowers see what I have posted before... 3 time only. Not to mentioned vacations to "your Mother-in-law" year after year where he will leave you with her & to take care of the children while he is out somewhere with his brothers or just in front of the TV (won't even talk to you till you stand in front of the TV).

He just called me... to say he was sorry...

I mentioned like someone else mentions (dinner & jewelry). You know what he answers me? "The jewelry he bought me (3 only from him, bracelet, necklace & my engagement ring) before marriage... I do not appreciate (yeah right.. I love jewelry u kidding me?)... so no point buying something redundant as jewelry "BIG waste of money" like he always says... besides NO MONEY!". You know how much he spent on a "rich men's sport?" his bike??? With all the tire replacements, races, gas to races, tubes, his helmet (gosh he lost one & just got a new one), his seat, his pedels (even comes presented like a jewelry).... etc. etc.... BUT OF COURSE he won't have enough for my bday gift or any jewelry of any kind.

Sure... he loves you... but always with words.

You know... just this vacation that he barely took off for me... I was waiting on him hands & foot in my house because he sprained his neck (riding too much). What a vacation... & we were supposed to go some where? He slept most of that vacation.

I love doing things free of charge like fishing & crabbing in the bay... that weekend we were supposed to go? We went to his bike race instead (last minute one).

Paycheck? Advancement? Did I hear right? Now you are talking about a guy who works when he has to, will not give up his hobby to pursue a freelance project that will help "finance" his hobby because it eats into his bike routine (3hrs a day.. plus 1 hr to blog about it). While the peanuts $$ that I am making goes to maintain his hobby when we needs it for gas & food??? His priorities is ALWAYS messed up... YOU like that?

Don't worry, within 6 months I will be advanced to what I should be making as a manager in my industry. They have already promised me that position, I do have a degree... just learning the ropes from bottom up.... you think I really need him?

Ask him, he'll tell you.

He needs me. Never the other way around. i need him for sex!

like I said... you want him?
You'd better be

#1) visually pleasing (he would never tolerate anyone fat... if he calls me "fat" from neglecting my self due to lack of time & a car & babysitting... & I am by no mans "fat".. (wear size 6)), but still never perfect in his eyes. He is always in better shape than you... major competition you know *he is always comparing*.

#2) can work alot (means both work outside & inside the house) ... part time, full time but still needs to maintain a very nice looking house.

#3) be willing to get very little in actions back "gifts", "vacations", "spending money" "car (he sees only the necessity in having only one car "his"... we are selling mine since only his is insured & I walk to work)", "time" ***

#4) he'd be moving in with you... not the other way around.

#5) share the paycheck... everything (nothing ever witheld back, just the way it is with me).

#6) sex is whenever he wants it... he'll see fit to refuse you BUT you could NEVER refuse him.... even if you are not in the mood. See.. I am never not in the mood... so he expects that from you! Cold fish need not apply... you have to be able to orgasm with proof you did but still put up with the frustrations when HE is NOT in the mood. All ONE WAY!

#7) he is bad with money, yet expects YOU to be good with it. Yeah.. means grocery = you spending money...not him. He will spend his money on lunches, eating out, drinks, his hobbies, gas for him for whatever. If you spend $100 for the family.... means he gets to do the same for HIM.

#8) He drives the car... yet you have to ask him for the keys if you need to do food shopping.... etc. Since he has the car... you go where he goes.

#9) Get use to him making you go places even if you don't really want to... he'll "nag" you till you give in anyways.

#10) No sleeping in... he hates it when YOU sleep in BUT he gets to. Means he'll make you get up, makes the bed... expecting you not to get back in again. I have to fight that one... he still does that to me even if i work till 3 in the morn.

#11) Clean, clean & clean....
get used to his messiness & laziness (he can be messy, but YOU cannot be). Gets forever to have him do things the "should' but don't want to. Especially after he sits in front of the computer.

#12) Be used to having his back turned on you. Why? He is not comfortable looking in the eye while talking to people... like to give you his back. Err... will never really be there for you... I was stuck on a hill once out of gas (he won't pick up his phone), another colleague came & helped me. Stuck babysitting while he do fun stuff. Stuck cleaning up his beer bottles / water bottles he drink.

#13) expect to serve him hands & feet (serve him food while he waits, when the plate is set in front of him is when he'll eats, gets him his water, fetch his beer.. basically full restaurant service)... his mom does that for him u see... so did I. You do not want him lamenting to try & get me back do you? Nor have you compared to his mom.

#14) Oh.. you'll have to be the plumber & home service person. *I* unclogged the toilets in the house (know how to use the snake)... he'll just pee on it. I believe that he can leave the seat up because its fair if he has to life it up after my use. I work to clear all drains, I am the one to screw in light bulbs (you can ask him how many light bulbs he changed... I am sure its within 3 of his fingers), change all replacements in the bath (soap, papers, shampoos), around the house & stuff.

#15) be a free maid & free sitter... that is a given... *MUST*, he never paid me for it, I'm sure he won't for you... its expected.

#16) Must be physically strong & healthy...
Must not like doctors too much... he does not believes in them, nor do I really. The only time we see doctors is when our head comes off the shoulders. He does not believes in sick leaves and has never dealth with someone who is always complaining that he/she is sick (physically).
See I have worked through all my chores with bleeding hands, fevers & bad knees... so shall the next woman.

#17) Must be able to lift 40lbs & above.... expect to move ALOT!!! Due to his job (changes)... we have moved every other year! Expect to carry your share when moving the furnitures... I did! 50/50.
He does not believe in his woman standing on the side "looking" & not helping.
If he carrys the cherry cabinet on one side... YOU are on the other end of it! His mom does just that... i did too... however many moves we have been through!

#18) Move alot!! He changes jobs quite a bit. So don't expect any roots!!! And you have to have a job that can move with his!! His "Job" will always be more important than yours... get used to it.

#19) get used to him not calling you when he promised, with tons of say "I'll do it" yet to become BS & ignoring you when you press the issues. You like broken promises? He'll be the one for you!

#20) Priorities... will always be HIM, never YOU. Get used to that.
He dictates if he wants to make more $$$ for the family. He dictates what he wants to eat, when he wants to sleep (computer u know... he'll call you up when he is ready not the other way around... always 5 mins/10 mins that turned into an hr or more...), what he does (can't tell him no... he'll do it anyways, won't respect your opinions), where he goes, if he needs gas more or wants his race more etc....

Oh... plus he gets very very prissy when he misses his ride for a day!

He'll also put you on a diet just because he thinks he needs one.... he eats what he wants for the "prime performance" he can get out of his physical needs. actually his whole family are all diet freaks!!!

So much for you ever enjoying a meal without feeling guilty of eating too much (and my culture loves food... mind you). He WILL make you feel guilty with the "Fat" word flying everywhere.... (OMG, ate too much, feeling too fat now... needs to burn more on the bike later/tomorrow... meanwhile knowing you will be left AT HOME, babysitting & feeling guilty you can't go to the gym... either that or haul the kid & let her sit out there by herself while you are on the aerobic maschines... nice huh!).

#21) I almost forgot... YOU have to put out... put out & put out!!! Means sex... he expects BJs (I give good ones.. :P) at least during your MS periods.... he loves that. So if you like giving BJs & also swallow... you will be a good fit for him.

theres probably a bunch I can think of... just not now. I'll add if you need me to.

If you are that interested, he's all yours... might take a while for him to forget me though (but if you are not better at "the list" than I, he'll have a very hard time forgetting me you know... he DOES loves to COMPARE alot!).

Me? Will finally have a great breather... no need of meds.
See... My family is clean of mental issues! And this is a very sound mind writing... (hmmm I can even kinda give a list! Wow!).
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