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Search: Posts Made By: TJW
Forum: Marriage Help 23rd August 2017, 07:57 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 6,577
Posted By TJW
Re: My wife and my mother

Yep. Only invite your mother sparsely, and don't keep her together with your wife any more than necessary.

The volume of the books is written about the mother-in-law-daughter-in-law phenomenon.
Forum: Marriage Help 23rd August 2017, 07:49 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 7,020
Posted By TJW
Re: My husband sent messages to a prostitute

No, and yes.

You cannot "just let it go". You need to negotiate with your husband to get the truth to the level at which you can know everything you are forgiving, and make an appropriate...
Forum: Marriage Help 17th July 2017, 12:43 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 5,494
Posted By TJW
Re: Feeling depressed

I agree with seeing your GP about it.

Dr. Phil McGraw says that we all have a "personal truth" which gets lived out in our lives. It is quite easy for us to know our own personal truth. It is...
Forum: Marriage Help 17th July 2017, 12:37 AM
Replies: 3
Views: 5,494
Posted By TJW
Re: Feeling depressed

tjw removed a duplicate post
Forum: Marriage Help 17th July 2017, 12:19 AM
Replies: 5
Views: 7,020
Posted By TJW
Re: My husband sent messages to a prostitute

Well, I have to hand it to him for admitting his mistake, but he has to go further than just an admission.

If your husband wants to rebuild trust, he needs to voluntarily submit to scrutiny of his...
Forum: Marriage Help 13th May 2017, 02:33 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 10,230
Posted By TJW
Re: Caught on dating site.

Amen. Her past behavior is a quite-reliable predictor of her future behavior. I had a wife like this years ago. It doesn't stop. An old country expression
in the southern US is ...."...get,...
Forum: Marriage Help 13th May 2017, 02:23 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 5,705
Posted By TJW
Re: Depression post marriage

I would advise you to see a lawyer BEFORE she gets here. You have a wife who is not your wife at all. She has never lived with you, supported you, or loved you. Neither have you been her husband....
Forum: Marriage Help 8th February 2017, 11:36 PM
Replies: 8
Views: 14,090
Posted By TJW
Re: Where did the sex go ?

I don't always "feel like" going to work. Yet, it is important for my wife and my extended family that I keep a steady income that meets their needs. I have to suck it up, drag a comb, and go do...
Forum: Marriage Help 8th February 2017, 11:31 PM
Replies: 16
Views: 19,465
Posted By TJW
Re: Well it's happened.

I'm so very sorry to hear of it. I have never had a divorce and so I can only imagine the pain and rejection it must bring to you. My prayers will be with you for your recovery and a continued...
Forum: Marriage Help 25th September 2016, 03:23 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 9,621
Posted By TJW
Re: Separated and confused

Amen. And, if I were you, I wouldn't want my children within 1000 miles of her. Chosen gave you good advice. Allow her supervised visitation only if you can She will make a royal mess out of...
Forum: Marriage Help 24th September 2016, 09:46 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 8,313
Posted By TJW
Re: Marriage Problems While Deployed

It is absolutely an excuse. My wife cheated on my with (known) 3 different men. In that day, there was no such thing as a "text message" and email was only used by computer-literate people.

Even...
Forum: Marriage Help 21st September 2016, 05:53 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 8,313
Posted By TJW
Re: Marriage Problems While Deployed

It sounds to me as if she has "moved on" emotionally to another man. It sounds also like
this was at least transitional back before your deployment.

Not wanting a divorce is absolutely not the...
Forum: Marriage Help 12th September 2016, 11:55 AM
Replies: 34
Views: 52,297
Posted By TJW
Re: Husband Wants Me To Have Sex With Other Men

Yes, and I am one who knows it is not. It is not based on my knowledge, or my experience, or my own authority. It is based upon the never-changing Word of God.

Please, as you "move forward',...
Forum: Marriage Help 9th September 2016, 12:40 PM
Replies: 36
Views: 55,871
Posted By TJW
Re: A future after wife's affair?

Firstly, let me say that I have been in your shoes in a previous marriage.

And, I'll tell you what I did to restore my own sense of manhood and selfhood. I could not remain in the relationship...
Forum: Marriage Help 10th August 2016, 03:57 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 12,067
Posted By TJW
Re: Separated for almost 4 months...do I give up?

No, it won't. For a man, his basic need for respect gets met there. A man has to become unselfish to spend time with his family, because there are no "rewards" to be found in his home, except...
Forum: Marriage Help 3rd August 2016, 11:30 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 12,067
Posted By TJW
Re: Separated for almost 4 months...do I give up?

At some point, you simply need to cut your losses and move on. As to whether that point has arrived, only you and God can decide.

The fact is, you cannot change your husband. All people reach...
Forum: Marriage Help 17th July 2016, 06:23 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 9,730
Posted By TJW
Re: Dealing with wife's infidelity - we have kids

Your wife is headed for BIG trouble with this liar she is moving off to live with.

Get a good, aggressive, barracuda lawyer and keep your daughter as far away from this fiasco as possible.


...
Forum: Marriage Help 7th July 2016, 08:19 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 9,730
Posted By TJW
Re: Dealing with wife's infidelity - we have kids

No, sorry, I must respectfully disagree with this. From my perspective, her behaviour is utterly consistent with her character, over a long period. I present the following evidence:



My...
Forum: Marriage Help 6th July 2016, 10:51 AM
Replies: 12
Views: 13,477
Posted By TJW
Re: I messed up, is there any hope for my marriage?

May I recommend Larry Burkett. Brother Burkett has gone home with the Lord for 14-odd years now but his books and tapes remain available through Crown Financial Concepts and christian bookstores. ...
Forum: Marriage Help 5th July 2016, 05:27 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 11,190
Posted By TJW
Re: Desperate.

at this point in time, there is absolutely no chance for you to have a successful relationship as more than a friend to her. It is not impossible for her to change, however, the likelihood that she...
Forum: Marriage Help 5th July 2016, 12:48 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 11,190
Posted By TJW
Re: Desperate.

I'm so very saddened to hear that. My church experience isn't great, either, but certainly not as heinous as what you endured. I apologize to you for the "brothers" and their sins, I can understand...
Forum: Marriage Help 4th July 2016, 08:57 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 11,190
Posted By TJW
Re: Desperate.

Yes, the pain will pass.

"daft" ? Yes, certainly is absurd. You can neither change her, nor give her what she needs. In fact, no human being other than herself can change her, and no one can...
Forum: Marriage Help 4th July 2016, 02:34 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 11,190
Posted By TJW
Re: Desperate.

You are exactly RIGHT about her, she even says it about herself:





Because you fill her needs for companionship and togetherness. "Bad boys" don't, and won't. They are too selfish and...
Forum: Marriage Help 4th July 2016, 01:59 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 13,477
Posted By TJW
Re: I messed up, is there any hope for my marriage?

As long as you recognize that "denial" is something we CHOOSE to be in, in order to justify our actions to ourselves.

It is very self-defeating. Take steps now to improve your own independent...
Forum: Marriage Help 4th July 2016, 01:40 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 6,290
Posted By TJW
Re: Need some advice...

I believe there comes a time when a divorce becomes the "gnat" and the pain and suffering of a bad marriage becomes the "camel".

Your wife is believing in a lie, her "duty" is TO YOU FIRST. ...
Showing results 1 to 25 of 43

 
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