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-   -   Fiance' caught cheating!...Now what? (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/forums/showthread.php?t=2712)

DivaDespair 6th January 2006 05:13 PM

Fiance' caught cheating!...Now what?
 
I have known my fiance' for almost two years, we got engaged in July of 2005, we moved in together in October/05 to cut costs and save up for wedding expenses. My wedding is 10 months away and I found out that my fiance' has been involved with another woman for the past 4 years! Now what....?

I have no idea where to begin...I am so pissed that I could spit on him everytime I see him. He says, he is sorry, nothing ever happened, it was someone he met well before me and they never ended there relationship because he was determined to sleep with her. He says, it never happened and he was obsessed with the challenge. She says (oh yes, I talked to her) nothing happened either...he was just someone to talk to and she just ignored his sexual advances and was flattered by the attention.

What?!?!? Has anyone ever heard of anything like this??? Someone having a "hopeful" affair for 4 years. Can any offer any suggestions as to where we go from here.

Thanks,
DivaDespair

Helen 6th January 2006 10:05 PM

Re: Fiance' caught cheating!...Now what?
 
Yes. You say goodbye and hotfoot it out of there as fast as your legs can carry you.

DivaDespair, I don't mean to sound flippant. The feelings of betrayal and rage must be appalling. I would spit at him on your behalf if I knew him! This man has been having sex with this woman in his head since before you met. He has deceived you for the entire duration of your relationship. If this woman had given in to his advances, he would have slept with her AND married you. Why would you want to saddle yourself with a man like this? You deserve more.

I honestly feel outraged on your behalf! This forum is littered with the 'corpses' of spouses who have been cheated on and left in Hell. If this man could do it to you now, he can do it again. I urge you not to marry him and to thank your stars that you found out before you committed to him legally and in the eyes of God.


Helen

jaqmar2001 13th October 2006 10:31 AM

Re: Fiance' caught cheating!...Now what?
 
If he cheats with you now, he will be doing it in the future too....the kind of person that you cannot trust at all.

He possibly cannot be your life partner...

You need to break the relationship NOW before anyone gets hurt...

Martin.
Marriage Counselling...

angel11 7th November 2006 10:46 PM

Re: Fiance' caught cheating!...Now what?
 
Oh sweetie.

Please get out of the relationship. Be glad that you found out about his cheating ways before you commit your life (and the lives of your children) to him. If you stay with him you are taking a risk, A HUGE RISK that he will do it again and you will be policing him all of your life, always wondering. If you were my daughter I would encourage you to leave.

Good luck. Life is so confusing sometimes.

markus 4th January 2007 11:59 PM

Re: Fiance' caught cheating!...Now what?
 
Hopefull affair

wow thats the most pathetic lie ive ever read

you have to end this relationship for good

mia misty 15th January 2007 10:24 PM

Re: Fiance' caught cheating!...Now what?
 
I agree you need to get out while you can if he proposed to you and was still trying to sleep with someone else. There is something seriously wrong with him. Some men just can't be faithful to one woman no matter how wonderful he is. But if you really want to make this relationship work. Seek a relationship counseler and let him know how really hurt you are and that trusting him is something you might not be able to do right know. Plus did he tell you or did you find out by yourself. If he told you then maybe he is trying to change, but if not he didn't feel guilty about anything. You are the only one that can decide what you want. How much do you love him? Can you ever trust him again? Are you willing to try and will he stop doing this. If he says no then you should run. If he says yes then maybe he will change and you might want to postpone the wedding. You really need to do some thinking.

MPM 15th January 2007 11:50 PM

Re: Fiance' caught cheating!...Now what?
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Helen (Post 13942)
Yes. You say goodbye and hotfoot it out of there as fast as your legs can carry you.

Helen

Sad but true, you can do better & shouldn't have to start married life feeling like this.


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