Trial separation help :(

[Remlapeel]

Hi guys, this is my first post here. I found the site trying to find a miracle to save my relationship.

Here is my story:

I have been with my fiancee for 4 years, been living together for 3 and engaged for 3. Last week K. Came home from work saying she could do this any more and was unhappy( we have had talks about problems before but I didn't think they were this bad ).she says she need space as she has never been on her own( she jumped from her last boyfriend to me within a month). I tried to convince her that we could work on things but she said no. I gave her 2 days space and went back to see her, at this point I suggested I move out for a few weeks to give her some real space to see what life would be like without me, at this point she cried and said she thinks it might work. I told her I wouldn't contact her and I'd let her make the first move. It's been a week and I haven't contacted her, but she hasn't contacted me and she seems to be enjoying life without me. I'm dying inside not knowing what's going on or what's she thinking.

One of my concerns is that she can't afford to move out of my house and she is stringing me along until she can. I feel like I'm being tortured, I miss her so much.

Any advice?

Stay strong or go home and deal with the result whatever it may be ?

[1aokgal]

Dear Remlapeel..

How about a ring and a wedding date? Maybe she got tired of living in a sham relationship instead of a marriage. You say you are "engaged," but live together. How long was the engagement to run? Now that the test run is over, is it possible for you to make a decision? I am sure she sees this as a "no win" plan and has given enough time. She sees the "no marriage in sight arrangement" and wants out.

Maybe you lose the best thing in your life because you can't tell her she is the one you want to be with for life? Instead of making a stand for the woman you love, and getting to the real problem, you left. Why did you leave? Perhaps you can be the "miracle" to change this.

Surely, you didn't think if you left the house it will get better? You lost a big chance to communicate and ask her what you can do to make her happy. She may feel you can't be counted on because you left and now has lost trust in you. Maybe she is a woman who wants to have children. Did you consider that?

You have a lot of work to salvage that realtionship because a man who won't commit for the woman he loves, proves he may be looking around for someone else to show up. I am just saying how she might feel. Maybe you can salvage what you had together and make love last a lifetime. Did you see this in the big picture?