Tell me I'm not the only one so I feel better

[madvice]

WARNING: the purpose of this post is to purely make me feel better, all I really want anyone to say is "I know how you feel".

I'm in a long term marriage and am wrestling with the following thoughts and dilemmas:

We've spent a good deal of time arguing over the years and the marriage has taken a battering and I now view my wife as a sister and have no romantic feelings toward her, I care for her but do not love her. On the odd occasions we have sex, it's a purely mechanical act with no feeling.
We talk about going our separate ways but, both love the kids dearly and don't want them to come from a broken home, but then again it worries me that we're their role models and they're getting a pretty distorted view of relationships and this will affect theirs in future...

I've been in this state for such a long time that it almost feels normal, however I fantasize about being in love and hope one day - after doing my time - it might happen.

[So alone]

I would like to ask have you thought about marriage counselling?

[dazed and confused]

Hi madvice

If my H felt he was doing Time or saw me as a sister I'd want him to go.

[Dave]

Of course yu are not the only one - in fact there are millions like you all round the country.

Take a look at http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/healthclub/servprov/ and book yourselves onto a weekend away with your wife - all the programmes are good, but I'd probably particularly recommend Marriage Encounter.

The weekend is completely private, no ghastly group sharings or the like, and gives you a chance to re-discover your love for each other. It's open to couples of any faith, or none, and is free (apart from the initial booking fee)!

Try it and see!

Dave

[mdmquincy]

You are not the only one.

If you invest properly, you can fix your situation. All of you deserve better, but you'll have to invest to get it done. Your wife will have to invest as well.

I wish you luck and admire your honesty and your search for answers.
J