arcos
22nd February 2010, 03:06 PM
It has been a while since I posted here, not for one reason in particular but many factors that have been occupying my time.
So I thought is was about time I said hi again to some old friends and maybe some new?
A quick update of events since my last post....
Nothing new from my ex apart from the usual BS and silly games.
The court date in January regarding custody was a disaster! Prior to the hearing I tried to come to an amicable agreement with my ex, through the lawyers, so that we could settle and without having to spend more time and money on this. I offered to drop my case for full custody IF she would agree to me having the boys Friday through to Monday inclusive. This was rejected out of hand by her lawyer. The resulting hearing finished with me having less access to the children! Despite the fact that it was ME who put this into court for reasons mentioned in previous posts. Both my lawyer and I felt that the judge did not even review the case properly and simply went on what my ex wanted, which, by the way, was for me to have NO access at all!!
I suppose I should be grateful that I have the boys every other week on those grounds!
So now it goes to a full hearing with me fighting for full custody, my ex does not want this to happen and has since suggested that we find another way. I do not believe that she is capable of any amicable agreements so a full hearing it will be.
Me only seeing the boys every other week has had a negative effect on them. They are far less responsive and less disciplined. My only hope is that my ex does come to her senses and come to an agreement prior to the full hearing as this is going to be horrible for everyone, particularly her!
On a positive note, after 9 months I have met a lovely lady! I have known of her for nearly 3 years but we have never actually met. A chance meeting in a cafe and an sms from her asking me for a drink has resulted in a very nice, gentle, 'relationship' occurring. We have spent many hours talking about everything with no holds barred. It has been a revelation for me to be able to talk properly about 'stuff' about 'things'. I havent talked so much in several years!!
Despite the hard times that I have experienced over these past months it shows that there is hope. Hope for everyone. Inspite of the barriers that I have put up over recent months to stop the 'intrusion' of the opposite sex and to try and focus my energies on the children she has come into my life and lifted my spirits enormously!
I have been in a bad place, mentally and emotionally for some time and I wish that this little story gives hope to anyone who finds themselves in a bad situation with their relationship.
Perhaps my acceptance of my own situation opened me up to be accepting of someone coming into my life? I don't know but what I do know is that this lady has been kind, caring, understanding and open with me. She has given me a psychological boost a physical energy to start putting things right in my life, getting myself back on track!
I wish everyone hope and a little luck!
So I thought is was about time I said hi again to some old friends and maybe some new?
A quick update of events since my last post....
Nothing new from my ex apart from the usual BS and silly games.
The court date in January regarding custody was a disaster! Prior to the hearing I tried to come to an amicable agreement with my ex, through the lawyers, so that we could settle and without having to spend more time and money on this. I offered to drop my case for full custody IF she would agree to me having the boys Friday through to Monday inclusive. This was rejected out of hand by her lawyer. The resulting hearing finished with me having less access to the children! Despite the fact that it was ME who put this into court for reasons mentioned in previous posts. Both my lawyer and I felt that the judge did not even review the case properly and simply went on what my ex wanted, which, by the way, was for me to have NO access at all!!
I suppose I should be grateful that I have the boys every other week on those grounds!
So now it goes to a full hearing with me fighting for full custody, my ex does not want this to happen and has since suggested that we find another way. I do not believe that she is capable of any amicable agreements so a full hearing it will be.
Me only seeing the boys every other week has had a negative effect on them. They are far less responsive and less disciplined. My only hope is that my ex does come to her senses and come to an agreement prior to the full hearing as this is going to be horrible for everyone, particularly her!
On a positive note, after 9 months I have met a lovely lady! I have known of her for nearly 3 years but we have never actually met. A chance meeting in a cafe and an sms from her asking me for a drink has resulted in a very nice, gentle, 'relationship' occurring. We have spent many hours talking about everything with no holds barred. It has been a revelation for me to be able to talk properly about 'stuff' about 'things'. I havent talked so much in several years!!
Despite the hard times that I have experienced over these past months it shows that there is hope. Hope for everyone. Inspite of the barriers that I have put up over recent months to stop the 'intrusion' of the opposite sex and to try and focus my energies on the children she has come into my life and lifted my spirits enormously!
I have been in a bad place, mentally and emotionally for some time and I wish that this little story gives hope to anyone who finds themselves in a bad situation with their relationship.
Perhaps my acceptance of my own situation opened me up to be accepting of someone coming into my life? I don't know but what I do know is that this lady has been kind, caring, understanding and open with me. She has given me a psychological boost a physical energy to start putting things right in my life, getting myself back on track!
I wish everyone hope and a little luck!