jealousy

[Unregistered]

it may sound stupid but i am jelous of a woman i have never met. when i started seeing my partner he used to talk to another woman all the time. she used to say that i was not good enough for him but he said that he didnt like her that much anyway. then i found a message he'd sent her after the 1st time we made love saying "i love you baby, still yours". now i feel inadequat and unloved and incredibly jealous. he says im irrational and go over the top because he never meant it. am i going over the top? am i as psycotic as he thinks? i just want to know what to do because its tearing me apart. please help!

[Kate]

There sounds as though there are grounds for jealousy. Presumably it was your partner who told you what the other woman had said about you not being good enough for him. What on earth was his motivation in doing that??

Do you really want to get involved in a sexual relationship with someone who seems to discuss you with another woman and leave text messages like that to her? I f he never meant it, then why do it? If you can't trust the guy then what are you doing sleeping with him? If he really loves you then you don't have to bribe him with your body!

I'm not surprised you are feeling inadequate and unloved if you base your value on his behaviour towards you. You are worth more than that - each individual person (including you!) is of great value, worthy of dignity and respect.

With best wishes

Kate :)