? cheating husband

[blondie65]

hi every1 i need some advice i have felt for a while that my husband has been cheating he has many women friends ex collegues and good friends. i have found texes from ex collegues that i am concerned about 1 says take it u don't want 2 talk 2 me fine may be found some1 better, and from another collegue sexy under wear? sexy 1s?34b was c til breast fed and yea 8 or 10 dependin how big or small they come up and that is a present should i be concerned blondie65

[Raymond]

I think you should be concerned Blondie. These are personal messages to him touching on sex it appears, which should be a subject only between you and him. The words have you found someone better seems to imply that he was relating in her eyes to her on a wrong intimate level.

The best slant I can put on it is that it all done in jest, but even then the thoughts one would get after receiving messages like that would be on a wrong level and not conducive to the intimacy that only you should share together.

Some men flirt because it builds up their self esteem but they are treading on dangerous ground as it could lead to something else.

As a man who has to relate to women at work one does know when they are stepping over a boundary and becoming intimate (verbally) on the wrong level. It's a thing you have to really watch as openings can happen which you can't handle.

I don't know why he is doing this but I think you have to bring it up somehow. I don't think you can say hey I've been going through your phone messages. The emphasis should be on being faithful to each other and cultivating an intimacy which belongs to you and nobody else.

I would use compliments and praise thanking him that he acted in an honourable and discreet way if you can find any instances where he does. Direct complaints may not work, but you have to find a way to do it.

Raymond


If he is really cheating then it is on a far more serious level.

[Beahotwife]

Yeah...been there, too.
I denied my husband's affair for over a year. Finally, a thorough confrontation allowed him to come clean.

People cheat for only ONE reason (And it isn't looks...hello, Tiger!)
The only reason people cheat is because their core needs aren't being met at home and they are too fearful to bring it up. Therefore, increasing communication, no matter how painful, is the only way to avoid or recover from an affair.

I enjoyed this article very much. Maybe it will help you, too. "Marriage is Boring (http://www.articlesbase.com/relationships-articles/your-marriage-is-boring-create-a-date-night-that-isnt-1076066.html)"