View Full Version : don't know what to do?
Unregistered
12th May 2002, 12:46 PM
Hi! My problem is this. My husband and I have been married for 9.5 yrs. Quite some time ago he quite paying attention to me. I was hopeless,didn't know what to do. I went to my sister for advice. She told me to flirt on him to get him to notice me again,so I did! To make a long story short, the guy I flirted with kept grabbing me and evenually asked me to sleep with him. I plainly told him no, I love my husband to much. The guy then went around saying that he did sleep with me, my husband believes this rumour. Now we are constantly fighting about it. He says that I did sleep around on him, and says that I am to defendsive when I tell him that I haven't. But I only recently told him what the other guy said. My husband thinks that I have done nothing but lie to him, I know that is not true. Should I just give up or is there any hope for us?
Liz
13th May 2002, 05:27 PM
What a muddle! Have you apologised to your husband for what you did do? You could ask him if he is willing to forgive you and make a fresh start. Flirting to make him jealous is not really the most constructive way of solving your problems. Another time you'd do better talking to him about your concerns rather than your sister.
You don't have to argue about this all the time. Your husband doesn't believe your story at the moment and is probably quite hurt by what you have done. Don't get drawn into a slanging match and dredging up the past. Just stick quietly to the truth. Why not have a look at the article on rebuilding trust (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/marriageclinic/infidelity/trust/) on the site and see if that gives you some ideas.
This doesn't need to wreck your marriage. We all make silly mistakes from time to time. Sooner or later you need to tackle the original concerns you had and do some work to build up your communication (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/healthclub/healthcomm/).
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