Sex Issues

[Braveheart2009]

Hi,

I need some advice regarding my sex life as I have been married about 1 1/2 years and always thought sex was one of the great things in life. I don't get allot of satisfaction from sex with my wife than I first thought I had. We do about 3 times a week, but I feel bored and its over quickly and leaves a mess.

Can anyone give me some advice how to improve my situation please?

Thanks.

[Ageing Grace]

its over quickly and leaves a mess.

Can anyone give me some advice how to improve my situation please?

Thanks.

The fact that you consider sex "messy" suggests you're uncomfortable about sexuality in some way, Braveheart. If you felt more relaxed about the fact that sex is, indeed, messy, you would possibly not want to get it over with so quickly.

There's little I can write here to work with you on this. Do you have some male confidants with whom you can talk about intimate matters? I think it will be a good start for you to get the bigger picture on what sex can be like (and can't be).

Best,
AG

[Raymond]

One and a half years isn't long. You have years to learn and one does need to learn. It is not always automatic. Prime thing is getting the relationship right, especially for the woman.

I would discuss it together but makes sure it is in a way that builds the other up as it is a very sensitive subject and rejection can easily be felt. As you share you may discover what the problem is.

Raymond

[huting]

Its ashame that u feel that way, have u always felt this way? If not what has changed to make u not like it. Sex is messy? When my h ejaculates,I love it because I know that he has been satisfied, same with me when I my h knows 2, it is not a mess,its a beautiful exchange between 2 people that love each other (or so it should be)

U say your bored,could you not just encourage your wife to dress up or massage u, be experimental, take the lead.

U need to figure out the reason behind ur feelings of sex,then u may actually start enjoying, once the problem is resolved of course

If your sex life is boring, experiment

If its messy, just take a romantic bubble bath together afterwards, cuddles are important too, this may help u reconnect to ur wife and vice versa

[Raymond]

I'd feel I hadn't succeeded if my wife didn't get messy so to speak.

Raymond

[spiderman]

Do you mean your wife has lost interest and just goes through the motions ....along the lines of 'pull my nightie down when you've finished' type scenario

I read it as theres no passion or connection there just a physical act ?