Am i grasping at straws or is this love

[walker99]

Although i can see that my wife is going to leave, i find it hard to except that she doesnt love me any more. She origonaly told me she would leave as soon as she found a house. However, because she has taken so much time to leave i am convinced that she does love me. A number of women that i have talked to who have left their hubands because they said they didnt love them, said that it did not matter how much furniture the house had, they had to get away as quikly as possible. This combined with her behaviour towards me, such as asking for my thoughts on how her new her hair style looked, and lately letting me touch her once again, and a disproving look when i mentioned staying out late, has given me hope. The question that plagues me is is this the sign of love or am i just grasping at straws?

[Unregistered]

It's hard to tell if this is LOVE or grasping. Sometimes when relationships start to fall apart the parties involved have many false starts. It's like trying on old clothes to see if they still fit. Be wary but you need to talk talk and talk, and delve into the real issues between you. It can be brutal but the window dressing isn't going to help. Sometimes it helps not to be intimate when there are BIG issues because it clouds the subject. Hand holding and such is good, but sex is potent and can make you feel things that aren't truly there. Be kind, listen, and be considerate but you must talk it out.

Peace

[Unregistered]

I replied to your last post and I had noticed many signs liek this with my husband - after he moved our I started putting bills in my name etc. it really threw him for a loop -- if she's not desperate enough to get right out I think she's waiting for you to convince her and show her it can work but I wouldn't do it desperately - or she may need to see your life can go on without her -- be nice and not clingy - read "Divorce Busters" I can't remember who wrote it but so far its given me hope and I hope that when his lease is up in a few months he'll be back and I think her actions are enough reason to hope

[Liz]

We have a review of Divorce Busting (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/marriageclinic/diffcommun/divbust/) by Michele Weiner-Davis on the site. Just click on the link. You can order it from Amazon either in the UK or the US.