What are they really saying?

[lonelylass]

I'll start with phrase and meaning:-
"I'll do that tomorrow when the weather's better"
Meaning - If I can get away with it I'll leave it until next year and if you really want it done, you'll do it yourself and then I can say "Oh love, I was going to do that today".

"WE really must tidy the house up"
Meaning-You have been sat on your butt all day and done no housework.

"I need some space, time to re-evaluate things"
Meaning - I fancy a s**g with someone other than you.

"I didn't see it"
Meaning - I did see it but thought if I left it you would pick it up then it saves me bending down which is such an effort.

Any more?:D

[tia1500]

" I can't remember "
I do but not telling


" I,m sorry I didnt mean it "
I,m sorry you found out

[lonelylass]

"I can't find it"
It's not right in front of my face when I open the cupboard, therefore you show me.

"I've changed"
I maybe 41 but I'm now going to act like I'm 14.

[justme&bailey]

you guys are the best..you have me rolling around laughing..man language what is that...a load of B*****ks...

Ahhh you have made my day!

XX

[tia1500]

" There is nothing to eat "
Meaning there is nothing in fridge i can just grab and eat what you cooking

" I Have had nothing all day to eat "
Meaning while you have been shopping i have sat on my arse all day because i can not be bothered to get up and make anything
:D

[lonelylass]

"Have you got a minute?"
Meaning - you know two hours later you'll still be holding this piece of wood as it doesn't fit properly.

"We're only friends"
Meaning - Actually it's a full blown affair, but I haven't got the balls to say.

"it's not you it's me"
Meaning - Its' not YOU it's THEM!!

[tia1500]

" We were going through a bad patch "
Meaning i been F***King someone else Why should i sort my problems out when i can cause more

[teacherman]

Oh god its get at men time again try these:

I will be ready in five minutes - forget it book the table for tomorrow instead.
No darling i will drive you deserve a drink - F**k you you drive i am going to get pissed.
Size doesnt matter - Oh yes it does
its not that much of a problem - Oh yes it is.

its not just us men

he he he
Still happy
still a tart
Still dont care

Tim

[Alice Alice]

how about body language
mine anyway...

i laugh when some one gets mad at me....i'm really stressing

[teacherman]

Try these

Sit down, relax, youve had a hard day.... Get up off your arse and help me in the kitchen
Lets just stay in tonight....... If you dont take me out then its over
Of course I love you..... ???????????????????????
Does this dress make my bum like big....... No its your bum that make your bum like big.
Do you think i am putting on weight, No.......... Of course you are get your butt to the gym

[Alice Alice]

Timmy!
don't go there with the big butt....hahaha....seriously

or what about

i was only joking......I'm glade i got that off my chest

or

i should go to sleep its 2am!.....hmmmmmm

[Alice Alice]

hahaha
correct me if i'm wrong but i think your speaking of a meadow that has cows grazing on
so you mean to say i smell like meadow muffins haha

Bring it on i'm ready to fight.....nothing better then a arm wrestle

or

all is fair in love and war.....i fight dirty

[Alice Alice]

Hey this thread has to keep going!!
BillyBoy where is your come back and LonelyLass where are you ?

the song from the beatles in in my head today

i say hello and you say goodbye

You say yes, I say no
You say stop and I say go, go, go
Oh, no
You say goodbye and I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello
Hello, hello
I don't know why you say goodbye
I say hello

Why, why, why, why, why, why

[lonelylass]

Hi Alice,

I'm back, just about!!:(

For better for worse, in sickness and in health.
Meaning - Until someone else comes along that takes my fancy.

[Alice Alice]

Lola
i bet its been a while since you have been free
spread your wings and feel the wind beneath your wings
(i know a bit cheesy) but works

soar with the eagles and remember to come back and tell us caged birds how wonderful it is

[tia1500]

HI

We will talk later .....Meaning i dont want to know hope you forget


" I,m not starting dont want to argue but".......Meaning you better get ready for world war 3

The word BUT why does that seem to cause so many arguments and pain. Three letters can cause so much hurt

[Alice Alice]

Billy you are funny!!!

[Alice Alice]

funny in a good way Billy....keep those fingers away haha

this might not match the thread but has anyone laughed in a funeral?...
or cry on the happy ending of a movie?....

[Alice Alice]

http://ak.buy.com/db_assets/prod_lrg_images/141/30197141.jpg

HAHA i have this t-shirt (in black) my sis gave it to me
Stay away long armed tickle fingered man hahahaha

[Alice Alice]

I found this on the google

What Job Applicants Really Mean:


I'M HONEST, HARD-WORKING AND DEPENDABLE: I pilfer office supplies.

MY PERTINENT WORK EXPERIENCE INCLUDES: I hope you don't ask me about all the McJobs I've had.

I TAKE PRIDE IN MY WORK: I blame others for my mistakes.

I'M BALANCED AND CENTERED: I'll keep crystals at my desk and do Tai Chi in the lunch room.

I HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR: I know a lot of corny, old jokes and I tell them badly.

I'M PERSONABLE: I give lots of unsolicited personal advice to co-workers.

I'M EXTREMELY PROFESSIONAL: I carry a Day-Timer.

MY BACKGROUND AND SKILLS MATCH YOUR REQUIREMENTS: You're probably looking for someone more experienced.

I AM ADAPTABLE: I've changed jobs a lot.

I AM ON THE GO: I'm never at my desk.

I'M HIGHLY MOTIVATED TO SUCCEED: The minute I find a better job, I'm outta there.

I HAVE FORMAL TRAINING: I'm a college drop-out.

I INTERACT WELL WITH CO-WORKERS: I've been accused of sexual harassment.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME AND CONSIDERATION: Wait! Don't throw me away!

[Alice Alice]

i found more

What Employment Ads Really Mean

"Competitive Salary" - We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

"Join Our Fast Paced Company" - We have no time to train you.

"Casual Work Atmosphere" - We don't pay enough to expect that you will dress up.

"Must be Deadline Oriented" - You will be six months behind schedule on your first day.

"Some Overtime Required" - Some time each night, some time each weekend.

"Duties will Vary" - Anyone in the office can boss you around.

"Must have an Eye for Detail" - We have no quality control.

"Seeking Candidates with a Wide Variety of Experience" - You will need to replace three people who just left.

"Problem Solving Skills a Must" - You are walking into a company in perpetual chaos. Haven't heard a word from anyone out there. Your first task is to find out what is going on.

"Requires Team Leadership Skills" - You will have the responsibilities of a manager without the pay or respect.

"Good Communication Skills" - Management communicates poorly, so you have to figure out what they want and do it.




the last one is my situation..."Good Communication Skills" - Management communicates poorly, so you have to figure out what they want and do it.


Billy i bet you tickle all the girls...:O:D

[val100]

Marriage help forum, what it really means Come on, sign up and flirt you bits off.

Honestly you lot.

What I really mean Hey Big Boy Billy How you doing????

Lol.

Alice you are a wonderland xxxx

[Alice Alice]

HAHA
i like that name its a good one
Big Boy Billy...blow your horn lol
it has me in laughing

i love the name Alice ....i have been told i live in my own world..."gaby's world"

Val did you read my post on Mic's thread?
you hit the nail on the head with that one

ps lets have a tickle party...its all fun and games until someone gets there eye poked ...ouch

[val100]

I have the crudest comment to that last line but I just can't say it while sober and on line.

If you want to haev a tickle party (AKA orgie, how do you spell it orgy???) you go right ahead. I am sworn off sex and tickling for the next......................


Well until someone closer asks, too much travel involved with you lot LOL

[Alice Alice]

yikes! that is funny haha
a tickle party :o

Am i the most naive here? LOL

Billy where are you and where have your fingers been not to mention your long arms??
...Val control yourself this is an innocent sentence hahahaha

i can't stop laughing!!

[val100]

Fairplay there big boy! at tickle party sounds like something your dads dirty fried would suggest Yuck!!!! How about a party somewhere great. There is the perfect place an hour away from here maybe after the trip to London we could do that! anybody on for renting a huge house over looking the bay in the county???

[val100]

Love poached, fried, benedict, scrambled and boiled.

My sister has the best butchers in the county, possibly the world so Tim and billy I will bring the meat??????

we will start to offend people soon.
Do I get any credit for the new names I have provided you two boys?
I swear there is no gratitude these days

[val100]

I was voluptuous once but then I lost loads of weight, More like two spaniels ears flapping in the wind these days.

Hey there dog lover!!

Micou ruled out vixen as she got people flustered earlier in her posts.

Nympho Noodle HHHHAAAAAAAA

Don't you dare!!!!!!


Honey and mustard sausages totally to die for, However her steak is bliss. Honestly

[lonelylass]

OOohhh, I love a good sausage.............:p

[lonelylass]

Val the Vamp?

[val100]

I will leave it in your capable hands there guys.

[tia1500]

I,m going to be sensible


....Val the PAL
:D

[val100]

I like val the pal. It doesn't highlight my fantastically talented abilities and my flexible joints or the smoking neighbours however it is solid.
thank you tantalising tia

[teacherman]

I second that emotion

Val the Pal - Friendly and helpful to everyone.
Niceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[val100]

Ah shucks,
Val the playful pal???
Val the valuable???

Noodlenut???
Nuttynoodle???

Feck why didn't I think of a better name.
H used to call me troubletreacy best not use that.

[Alice Alice]

Val Valentine her heart will warm up your life

Lola Pops up like tulips in spring

Tia is tricky ...what rhymes or goes with Tia?

Tart Man and BBB

this sounds like a movie to be had


EDIT TIME

Tantalising Tia (another name by val)
Vitalizing Val
Teasing Tia

i'm on a roll

[lonelylass]

Hey!! Welcome back Alice, missed you!

How did the move go? All settled in yet?

Really pleased to see you back.

Take Care,

LoLa:)

[Alice Alice]

Yes my dear i'm back and its good to see your stronger then ever!
i'm back and still getting things all sorted out

i'm off after posting like mad
i will be back and have msn running

ttyl Lola

[Alice Alice]

Brisk, erect walk ....Confidence
Standing with hands on hips.... Readiness, aggression
Sitting with legs crossed, foot kicking slightly ....Boredom
Sitting, legs apart Open,.... relaxed
Arms crossed on chest..... Defensiveness
Walking with hands in pockets, shoulders hunched..... Dejection
Hand to cheek..... Evaluation, thinking
Touching, slightly rubbing nose.... Rejection, doubt, lying
Rubbing the eye ....Doubt, disbelief
Hands clasped behind back...... Anger, frustration, apprehension
Locked ankles..... Apprehension
Head resting in hand, eyes downcast...... Boredom
Rubbing hands...... Anticipation
Sitting with hands clasped behind head, legs crossed...... Confidence, superiority
Open palm...... Sincerity, openness, innocence
Pinching bridge of nose, eyes closed..... Negative evaluation
Tapping or drumming fingers...... Impatience
Steep-ling fingers...... Authoritative
Patting/fondling hair...... Lack of self-confidence; insecurity
Tilted head...... Interest
Stroking chin..... Trying to make a decision
Looking down, face turned away..... Disbelief
Biting nails..... Insecurity, nervousness
Pulling or tugging at ear..... Indecision, fibbing

[teacherman]

"Did the earth move for you"........ Was I any good?
"I wll be ready at 8"............Pick me up at 9 I will still be putting my makeup on (Sexist??)
"Think I should loose weight"............You saying I am fat?

and just for Val and the girls

"We got any batteries?".......... Sod off and leave me alone I am playing with my bunny. (He HE)

[Too trusting]

My top two "favorites" (oh yeah!):

"I don't know."

"I don't remember."

Sometimes these ARE legitimate answers to whatever...BUT, in my experience, they often mean the same thing:

"There's no way in heck I'm gonna talk about that!"

(What makes it even better is that both my husband and I have spent years in communications! He's a working journalist. I was a journalist too until I "retired" to return to my first passion: art.)

[lonelylass]

Hey TT,

That ring so many bells and is so right too!

We should right a dictionary of b/s and body language!:D

LoLa x

[lonelylass]

Just had this emailed to me, thought you guys might like it!:D


WOMEN'S REVENGE

'Cash, cheque or charge?' I asked, after folding items the woman
wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote
control for a television set in her purse. 'So, do you always carry
your TV remote?' I asked. 'No,' she replied, 'but my husband refused
to come shopping with me, and I figured this was the most evil thing
I could do to him legally.'


UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)

I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.

MARRIAGE SEMINAR

While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,
Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
'It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and
dislikes.'
He addressed the man,
'Can you name your wife's favourite flower?'
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, 'It's
Homepride, isn't it?

CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle..
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton
balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, 'Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons
for your wife?
He answers, ' You see, it's like this,
yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of
cigarettes,
and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling
papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she.

WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a
word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'

W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use
a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat
everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'

CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
' The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it, because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.'
The husband said, ' You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for
my coffee..'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible
that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed
says..........'HEBREWS'

The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving
each
other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next
day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning
business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote
on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find
it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

God may have created man before woman,
but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

[Alice Alice]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Games_People_Play_(book)


http://www.website-articles.net/Article/Mind-Games-Men-And-Women-Play/8891