bath

[ph1ll1p]

hello.

i have been reading these forums for quite some time and have only recently gathered the courage to post. i am a young christian male (21) and i am very sincere in my religion and following the word of the lord.

i live with my parents and my sister who has a severe mental retardation.

i am most embarrassed about my problem. i have compulsive urges to masturbate when in the bath. whilst i have been able to keep these mostly under control with prayer and solemn thoughts, at times i cannot hold myself back and sin wickedly. i am very embarrassed about this and have spoken to my priest about this. he has helped with prayer and readings from the bible as well as penance.

because we save water at the house, we do share the bathwater. usually my father or mother will bath, then myself, then my sister.
recently i have spoken to my sister and she has told me she has not had her period for several months. she is also sick in the mornings and has been growing an enlarged belly.

i believe i may have impregnated her with my sinful seed that i disposed of in the bath water.

i am not sure what to do now. i do not feel comfortable telling my priest or my parents and have only just been able to write this without shaking uncontrollably and weeping.

please can anyone help me with this.

yours in the lord,
phil

[Kate]

Dear Ph1ll1p

You seem to be very wrapped up in shame and guilt at the moment. It seems to me thta there are a number of issues here.

First of all the masturbation. Many people do not think the desire to masturbate is something wrong. It is good that you hve been able to talk to your priest, but you might alos consider going to talk to your doctor or a sexual counsellor if you are really concerned about what you are doing or what might lie behind it.

Secondly, their is the issue of hygiene. I don't think I would like to share bath water with the rest of the adults in the family but if that cannot be avooided then why not deal with your urge in some other private place before bathing and then your poor sister won't have to get into the dirty water.

Finally, I am not an expert but I think that it is very unlikely that you could get your sister pregnant in the way you suggest.

Your parents must be aware of any changes in your sister's health. If they are not then, why not express your concern for her to them and I DON'T mean mentioning your own fears! There could be a host of other explanations for what your sister is saying, especially if her mental health means that she doesn't understand what is going on around her.

Best wishes

Kate

[seaview]

There is no shame in masturbating...stop being so naive and just enjoy it.Its perfectly normal.:)

[danielx]

Hello Phillip,

Seaview is right - there is no shame in masturbation, it is normal. Do not listen to people who try to put guilt on you for this - it is simply not worth worrying about. And sperm is not sinful.

Secondly, Kate is right - the chances of you getting your sister pregnant in this way is so unlikely as to be practically impossible. Sperm can live outside the body for some time in a warm wet environment, and for days in a womans body, but I do not think that soapy bath water is likely to be good for sperm survival. Generally speaking, the way that sperm get inside a womb is that they get put there - they only have the task of swimming the last few centimeters in an environment suited for them to do that - they do not make the comparatively epic journey that you envisage.

Your sister may be pregnant, but I doubt that you are the father. Do not worry about it and do not express your fears to others - they are only likely to complicate what might be a difficult time for all concerned. Be supportive and show normal brotherly concern for your sister.

Try to avoid sharing bathwater - it really is not a good idea. If you want to save water then washing with a wet flannel in fresh clean water is probably the better option. And if you must share bathwater then don't masturbate in it - it just isn't nice.

Take care

DX