How do you show your spouse love?

[jcb]

Question: How do you show your spouse love?

[jcb]

Wow, I guess that nobody here knows how. That maybe why some of you are in the mess'es you are in.

After reading how messed up some of you here are. I have decided my marriage isn't that bad.

Have a good life, and I wish you all the best.

This is my last post.
Goodbye.
jcb

[SouthofFrance]

I'm glad you think your marriage isn't that bad, but I guess there must have been something wrong to have brought you to this site in the first place?!!
I would hazard a guess that no one replied to the question 'How do you show your spouse love?' is because there is no hard and fast answer to that question, different people have different needs, some spouses need to be shown love by words, some by actions. What works for one person doesn't necessarily work for another.
I suppose the easiest way is to find out what makes them feel loved ask them? Is it being showered with gifts, taken out, a hug, a chat about how they are feeling, has your spouse asked you to show more love is that what brought you here?
Bur please remember that most people on this site as you call them 'messed up' are only in that state due to other people's actions, and are using this forum to seek comfort from others who understand, and provides invaluable support for a lot of people - so please don't be too harsh!

[calmfornow]

We do get some strange posters on this site don't we..............................?:D

[AnnieP]

hee hee.....

[markus]

Elvis has left the building!

[gizelle_z]

If you really love your spouse then he or she will know. Kindness, caring, looks, small things, good sex, a need to solve problems, loving words, love letters, SMS or email, lots of touching, understanding.

[asiarose27]

My wife doesnt love me then if the above is true ! I get none of these things:(
Hi morty
Don't be sad.Depends on personalities type,how brought up,cultural etc
Some people can say/show/do.some can't/won't.I'm that kind of person who show/say/do things to my husband & to our sons.My husband who is psychiatrist & GP(he should know) never showed none of them in almost 22 years of our married life,but he's a good husband & father and son.He never said to me''i love you'' to me,our sons.He never hug me or kiss me on my cheek when he leaves home in the morning!!When our eldest son was about 15-16 years old:he even said to us:dad never hug to mom once.My husband said it's bec:of cultural(asians).I do agree that if you love someone you can tell from your look,kind,caring,showing by actions & behaviours.You don't have to do it for your spuouse to know,it will come naturally.My hubby even didn't call me'sweetheart/darling' to me/kids.I do call my kids.My hubby said he can't pretend to be like that.For me: doing/showing all are coming from my heart,not pretending.We all are different people!!!you can't expect the same things.Please try understand your spouse if they don't.I've order 'the five languages of love'',i'll readit and i want him to read.But i will not expect he will change his attitudes as he's 60yrs old.His father was a kind/affectionated gentleman but he wasn't like his dad.:(

[asiarose27]

Morty
Understand again!People do change as well as their feelings depends on time,events,circunstances,communication between you & your w or if she unhappy'/ resent something you've said/done,everything is possible.Because i myself changed to cold towards hubby & sons when my beloved dad died unexpectedly(i only knew, nursing him 2 weeks before he died)in back home and a year later my mum died again,since then i changed a lot.My heart was empty,i didn't care to sons' emotional needs,i just only took care of their physical needs.I resent my hubby for he didn't let me go back & see my dad when he was well(his reason was kids were so young),before my mum died he didn't like i went everyday(80 miles trip):i knew that night she was dying,ment to go back to hosp:but he didn't let me go back that night(his reason was i was so tired & souldn't drive 80miles at night time,we were arguring whole night:next morning before i left home:mum passed away.Like that:things you didn't know/aware:could be hurt to her.My hubby didn't know i resent him for those and now i'm not the same person.i try so hard for many years to be happy with warm heart again(for our sons).Your wife should see counselor(on her own or both),if she open up what's inside,what's the problem?For me:i read selfhelp books.I came across this fourm to help my best friend's marriage,same problem like you:her hubby stop showing any caring/loving,although not third party involved,just 8 years of mar,no kids.Can you talk to her? First she need to accept it something happen to her/change her.With counselling:she will open her heart through talking ,like we're doing now.If she and you know what was the issues,find how to change/heal.It take time.I do Prayer for peace & happiness(positive affirmation prayers) although i'm a buddhist & do regular meditation.''Happy heart come first,then happy face & smile come'',To be loved,being loved:you must have a happy & warm heart !!!It's my own & true experiences.
praying for you & your wife! Please say it''peace be with you(your wife name) most of the time everyday.That words will change her.In Barbara Mohr's Cosmic ordering servicing book:that words change other person:author tried with her aunt,niece and to other people.TRY it with belive in & faith in what you're saying,,Marty!!Usually MEN don't believe those things,aren't you ???
Good luck!!Let me know.Hope tohear it.'':).Hray...it's work''
XXXX

[gizelle_z]

In my first marriage I had a man who claimed he loved me very much and that he could not live without me. He spent a terrible amount of time at work and never had much time to support me. He was the only important one. After 25 years I told him I wanted a divorce. He went made. He lost 25 kgs in three weeks. He cried, swore, said people thought I was made, chased me in his 4x4. It went on and on. Then he started slandering anyone I mixed with. It became so bad that eventually people turned on him and at last the truth came out. He was a stripshow addict!!!! All the time while I thought he was working late he was going to one stripshow to the other. So all along, even though I only saw one side of him, I was right to believe that I just had to get away from him.

How do you know your partner really loves you? Who knows.

I am now married to a wonderful man, but I can't bring myself to trust him. I spy on him in all sorts of ways and have been disappointed a few times. His email is slightly suspect in that he and his friends send each other nude pictures. He visits sites with nude young ladies. He does not know I know. We have a very active sex life and he tells me every day how sexy I am and how much he loves me, but still I am not enough.

How do you know your partner really loves you? Who knows.