Long hours

[Marverline]

Ive recently just got married. This is my second marriage, as well as my new partner, but already its showing difficulties, as my husband works long hours and when he comes home, he just eats and then sleeps, so we dont get a chance to talk about stuff, also we have 2 babies, and that keeps me busy also. I feel frustrated about the situation.

[Trillian]

Oh my goodness, Marverline, I really know how you feel! My husband is gone so much this time of year at work, that when he gets home he's just beat, or sick, and we end up just being couch potatoes. Do you stay home with your children? I stay home with my 2 year old and we do not live near family at all, so I spend a lot of that time just me and my son. For example this week, hubby is gone Thursday night-Sunday night. I found myself in a real funk these past few weeks and have decided to be proactive, starting emailing all my friends to get together for lunch, dinner or playdates, even if that means hauling my son along with me. I'm also considering joining a church gym that has free child care and a couple of moms groups. That way, I am taking care of my end of the deal and getting out and being social. I finally got hubby to sit down and talk. Can you ask your hubby if he can give you a time that you guys can talk, so that way you'll have it schedule in and he won't feel pressured if he's not feeling like talking at that moment. Tell him how you feel and see if you guys can schedule some "date" time even if it is to watch a movie, play a game, dance in the living room, have some wine, whatever, even if it is after the kids are in bed or if you have someone who can watch them.

Trillian.

[Marverline]

Hi Trillian

Thanks for your support, I felt a bit alone on this subject, and I thought it would be good to join a forum for some support and feedback and also to share my experiences to help others. My husband and I have talked about it, and ive suggested that he gets a nine to five job so that he is not so tired in the evenings, he only eats and then I have a window of 10 to 15 minutes to talk to him before he starts snoring. We have two children together, one is 2 on Friday and the other is 3.5 months old. I also have a 15 year old boy and a 19 yar old teenager girl, they do help with the babies sometimes, as im on maternity and will go back to work in January.

Ive suggested to my Husband that we book weekends away occasionally when we can get a baby sitter. weve been together for 4 years but just got married at the end of July 07.