A little help.........

[2becomes1]

I have recently seperated from my wife off 3 years, we have been together for 7 years all in, the separation was agreed by both of us
as the spark was gone and although we tried to make it work, the feelings we had for each had gone.

I have just completed my first week apart and i feel very alone,
i have told friends and family and everyone keeps saying, you'll get over it
and find someone else.......

I suppose my question is .... how do i move on ?

I dont wanna go out every weekend and get absolutely drunk...

Help and advice appreciated :)

[David H]

I have recently seperated from my wife off 3 years, we have been together for 7 years all in, the separation was agreed by both of us
as the spark was gone and although we tried to make it work, the feelings we had for each had gone.

I have just completed my first week apart and i feel very alone,
i have told friends and family and everyone keeps saying, you'll get over it
and find someone else.......

I suppose my question is .... how do i move on ?

I dont wanna go out every weekend and get absolutely drunk...

Help and advice appreciated :)

Hi, sorry to hear of your situation.

It might be helpful for you to ask yourself what went wrong in your relationship? Sometimes relationships just run their natural course and the two people concerned find that they are naturally developing (changing) in different directions and have naturally drifted apart.

Other times some vital ingredients necessary to sustain the relationship may have been missing, perhaps leading to conflicts that couldn't be negotiated or resolved. I find Dr Harley's website useful in that respect...

Particularly here: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3000_intro.html

A lot of times a relationship ending is a good opportunity to analyse the relationship and it's end and then do some work on yourself.

There are a lot of links in this thread on this forum:
http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/forums/showthread.php?t=4085

David

[Kate]

Dear 2becomes1,

You must feel very down and lonely after all the hope of the early stages of a marriage, and the fun of sharing life together and always having someone there for you.

Are you both sure that you want to move on? It seems so sad to end a marriage just because the spark has faded and the romantic feelings gone.

Many couples go through a stage of disillusionment, but they can come through the other side of it. There are some articles here (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/marriageclinic/diffdisill/) about the challenges this brings. You might also think about doing some marriage enrichment (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/healthclub/servprov/).

If your marriage is really over then there is some useful advice here (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/marriageclinic/whenover/).

Whatever happens this is going to be a painful time for you. Keeping yourself busy even at weekends may help a bit.

I hope some of the articles help a little.

Best wishes

Kate