Help

[JLW]

I have been married for 16 years now. Am very much in love with my husband but have a very serious problem.
Our sex life is almost extinct. I have a husband that doesn't realize the importance of keeping himself clean. If he wants to get close to me the body odor is very offensive and I can't enjoy his touch. I have tried telling him he needs to bath, but he just ignores me. His idea of a bath is just sitting in the tub. ( maybe 3-4 times a month) The last ten years have been very fustrating. About the only time we enjoy each other is on vacation because then he showers everyday. I have basically given up on telling him becasue he ignores me. I feel very lonely in this department. I know that he blames me for no contact, but he doesn't understand why. I used to try telling him, but the angry looks and silence is all I would get in return.
Does anybody have any ideas as to what to do?

[Helen_uk]

JLW

Is there anyone else he might listen to ? Other people , people at work etc must notice this as BO is a strong smell.

Perhaps you could try turning bathtime into a bit of an erotic time, go in and offer to soap his back etc. Or run the bath for him and put some nice smelling salts or oils in, I had a similar problem with my ex's brother who lived with us for a while ( not an intimate one , but a smelly one ), he never used to bath and working in a factory he used to smell terrible by the end of the week. My ex used to run a bath and then say he hadn't time to have it so would his brother like it instead, only a short term solution of course, but he did get the idea in the end.

It's not pleasant when people are like this and I'm sure you've tried the route of buying lots of nice deodorants etc for Xmas and birthdays for him. At the end of the day you may just have to get brutal and say if he doesn't shower he doesn't get sex and that it's him causing the no sex by not being clean. Don't allow him to blame you, make it clear who's at fault.

Good luck

Helen

[Raymond]

Could not you get a close tactful man friend or relative of his to mention something? If it wasn't confrontational and kept light it could work.

Just a thought.

Reymond

[marriedbrunette30]

My husband and I used to have a similar problem.he is a mechanic,so would come home completely covered in grease and not shower right away.Then he'd try to kiss me and stuff.
I finally told him,dont plan on touching me or kissing me until you get a shower first.
(hey,I used to get zits and his greasy face rubbing all over mine didnt exactly help)

Now,I will also properly motivate him.tell him if he wants some lovin to get cleaned up first.Also,subtle hints like cologne or after shave as stocking stuffers doesnt hurt. I can gently say...where's that cologne I bought you it really turns me on.

Over the years he has gotten the hint.just be blunt about it.tell him you'd love to be more intinmate but would like him to shower first.If he is like most men,he will run to the bathroom!