My husbad told me he is an atheist

[RedAngel2560]

My husband and I got married almost 9 monthes ago. He was forced to go to church as a child and his father moved out when he was 10. When we got married, he said that although he believed the basics of Christianity, he was not happy with organized religion at the moment. I was raised in church and although I have not been attending church regularly for the past year because of my job, it is very important to me. We discussed the importance of raising children in church and he promised that when we had children we would attend church as a family. A few days ago, he informs me that he has decided that he does not believe in God, Heaven, Hell or the devil. I am at a lost because I feel like I don't know him at all. Please help!

[Kate]

Dear Angel

First of all, don't panic. If your husband has been pressured into going to church in the past, then he needs to come to faith for himself. Admitting he doesn't believe in God, the devil etc may be the first step of an honest search for the truth.



Although it is hard, what he needs most now is to see the love you have for him, love that has its basis in Jesus' love for you. Pray for him, ask others you trust to pray for him and stay firm and gentle in your own faith. Make sure that you have support in that faith, even if you can't go to church on a Sunday, then there must be mid week meetings you can get along to.



I suspect you will find that this situation will really focus your mind on what you believe and how you need your relationship with God (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/tips/hope.html).



Remember your husband has not changed totally - he is still the same person but you are beginning to discover who he really is. We never know our husbands totally when we marry. Both of you will grow and change throughout life and marriages thrive when the couple learn to adapt to those changes and to go on loving and accepting each other unconditionally.



My husband was not a Christian when we married and we have both changed and grown since then in lots of ways including our faith.



At some point in the future why not consider doing some marriage enrichment (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/healthclub/servprov/). Programmes like Marriage Encounter (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/healthclub/servprov/marenhres/meang/) enable couples to understand and work with each other in their differences.

All the best

Kate