stayathomemom
26th July 2005, 05:14 PM
I am a stay at home mom with three wonderful children. I met my husband 4 years ago. When I met him I thought that he was a wonderful christian man who was after Gods own heart. He appeared to be a Godly man. He wanted to have bible studies with me when we dated and I thought thank you Lord I have met the man of my dreams. The first year of our marriage was spent daily in the word of God an prayer. My dream turned into a nightmare. After the birth of our son we would take turns getting up in the middle of the night with our baby. When it was a few his turn a few times I woke up and the LOrd would lay on my heart to check on my husband that something was not right. So I would sneak around the corner and found out that he was watching pornography on tv. When I confronted him with it he lied to me about it for two years and told me that he would not do such a thing that I was the apple of his eye and that he did not want to look at another women and had no desire to look at another women. He also said that God knew his heart and he knew that He was telling the truth. ( Man what a dangerous thing to say) Well the following year he decides to tell me the truth. I guess after feeling guilty for so long. He told me that He made a mistake only one time, I know that it was more then one time that he watched pornography but he will not admit to the many times just one time. When I found out at the time my whole body went numb I could not believe what I was seeing. He told me that he did not have a problem with pornography he just made one mistake ( which is not true) he watched it many times. Our sex life has been great throughout the years. We make love every other night. He told me that he doesn,t watch it anymore because he saw how bad that he has hurt me, and disappointed me. When we are out in public he would stare at every women that walked by with cleavage showing and a short mini skirt. My heart is aching and I am very hurt, I can,t trust him right now and don,t know if I will be able to trust him because of the lies throughout the last 4 years. When you confront him with anything, he gets mad, but then later on decides to tell the truth. He told me that he repented and got his heart right with the Lord. When I do catch him looking at someone out in public I confront him and he would get irritated and say I wasn,t looking at her sweety. You know you are the only one that I want to look at ( same old line he used before) Then he would say I know I told you this before but now I mean what I say. I don,t know what to believe. Now I have another problem. My husband works in the shipping dept at a factory on first shift. It was just working with three guys on first shift. Well they had hired a girl for second shift to work in the shipping dept but she has to be trained on first shift to work second. My husband said that they asked him to stay over and work with her. I asked him if it was mandatory for him to stay over and work with her. He did not give me a yes or no answer he just said well they don,t have anyone else to train her that knows what they are doing like they told him that he did. So he has to work from the hours of 3:00pm to 7:30pm alone with her until she knows what she is doing for two weeks or longer. I asked him why did you not tell me that they hired her the first day that she was there, but instead waited three days to tell me. He said because I knew that you would not like the idea of me working alone with a women. This women that is working with him has to work from 3:00pm to 11:00pm so I asked my husband well who trains her after you leave at 7:30 pm He says another guy trains her after he leaves. I asked him well why can,t he train her the whole time instead of you having to work over with her. My husband told me because the guy who works over with her after I leave has to work in utilities and has other stuff to do. He gets upset when I question him. I said well can you ask your boss if they could put someone else to working with her besides you? He says well I told my boss that I would work those hours with her and that if I go back and ask him if he could find someone else to work with her then I would be going back on my word and it would be all over the plant that my wife doesn,t like me working alone with a women. I told him that well if it were you I would be more worried about what you thought then what other people thought about me because you would be my first priority. He got mad and we got into it. My husband decided this past weekend to buy me flowers now he is opening car doors for me. Hasn,t done this in along time. Should I be concerened about this situation with him working with this girl alone or not. If it was around a bunch of people he was working with I wouldn,t mind so bad, but he is alone with her. My husband told me that he was sick of hearing about it me asking questions and he gets mad when I do Any suggestions anyone??