Matt1
9th June 2004, 08:24 PM
Im heart broken, my boyfriemd doulgas has said that he doesnt want to be with me,last Friday I was at the gym, I text and asked when he finished work would he mind come and pick me up on his way home, as I go to his at weekends.
We were driving along and I was telling him about a job i had applied for, that i would though would be good at it, Was for a Team Leader. he replied " i dont think you have any team leader qualities at all' and i said i dont know, but i can try he didnt like me answering back. ( he didnt say go for it and apply and good luck)
We then started talking about his day and I asked him how it went, he said I could have a job at his wrk he is a trainer with national express bham. He would be training me and doing my induction, we have talked about this before and I said I didn’t think I could be in his training sessions.
He is on managment band, it goes to his head... hes bigheaded and boasts a lot about his job, and talks non stop about his work He asked me what id do if i did his job the company has a alcohol policy what and how would i deal with someone who had had a drink at lunchtime.
I said " Id would say to them are you aware that we have a policy and tell them again, then would leave it to them , i have given them the information if they didnt stick to thet then i would take the matter higher.
He replied " its not their problem its yours, I am the trainer its my responsibility to make sure" I said you cant follow people round and force them, if they do it then you take it futher up the ladder, not take it personaly.
i asked if the lunchtimes were unpaid, he said no, i said if they had of been then its classed as own time therefor he woldnt really have any major control.
He was going on about how he knows and he did get this job for nothkng.. and saying i wooldnt be a good teamleader.
I had enough and place my had over his mouth, and one on his head, he moved and my finger went into his eye, he said i hit him and assulted him of which i agree it was wrong. from reading this you prob think i am a monster.
I now know i should have handeled it differently You can't silence someone just because they are saying something you don't like; you need to learn to articulate your feelings. E.g., 'Douglas, you're entitled to your opinion. But, I am trying to better myself by applying for this job and I would really appreciate your support. It hurts when you make me out to be incapable of doing the job. Perhaps you could give me the benefit of your experience and tell me how I can acquire the qualities needed...' etc etc. Rather than grabbing his face and trying to stop his mouth from moving
He said it as over as he could not be with someone who ' would psyscialy assualt him.
LAst week we fell out and he said he didnt want to see me.. I went out, i went to the gym and then out with a mate, he called late afternnon, i didnt answer, he text me saying " can i come pick you up so we can talk" he came and picked me and drove all the way to redditch, we found a quiet spot and talked for 2 hours, we made some goals, he stayed over and all was ok..
I feel very guilty and ashamed. I love him and want him back. I didnt mean to grab him.
I went with adam and emma to collect my stuff last night, my clothes etc that i had there, I spoke to him on the phone Monday Night. he didnt want to see me as it will be very emotional day for both of us and he said he will get upset if he sees me. I went along as i had to give directions, i got out the car before they went to his house.
They got my stuff and came and picked me up, they said he couldnt look them in the face, he was very sheepish and very embarrassed.
He sent me a text on out way home saying
"Adam and Emma have collected your stuff, i founc your books, If i find anything else will let you know, cant find your carry on dvd, when i do will send it on to you. Take care Douglas."
I feel a bit awkward as He asked that neither of us have contact yesterday, yet he text me something i already knew. I am missing him so much, i worked out that 4 weeks time it will be july 10, thats his birthday, thats the ammount of time hes asked for.
i want to text him or phone im missing him so, im scared of his reply
We were driving along and I was telling him about a job i had applied for, that i would though would be good at it, Was for a Team Leader. he replied " i dont think you have any team leader qualities at all' and i said i dont know, but i can try he didnt like me answering back. ( he didnt say go for it and apply and good luck)
We then started talking about his day and I asked him how it went, he said I could have a job at his wrk he is a trainer with national express bham. He would be training me and doing my induction, we have talked about this before and I said I didn’t think I could be in his training sessions.
He is on managment band, it goes to his head... hes bigheaded and boasts a lot about his job, and talks non stop about his work He asked me what id do if i did his job the company has a alcohol policy what and how would i deal with someone who had had a drink at lunchtime.
I said " Id would say to them are you aware that we have a policy and tell them again, then would leave it to them , i have given them the information if they didnt stick to thet then i would take the matter higher.
He replied " its not their problem its yours, I am the trainer its my responsibility to make sure" I said you cant follow people round and force them, if they do it then you take it futher up the ladder, not take it personaly.
i asked if the lunchtimes were unpaid, he said no, i said if they had of been then its classed as own time therefor he woldnt really have any major control.
He was going on about how he knows and he did get this job for nothkng.. and saying i wooldnt be a good teamleader.
I had enough and place my had over his mouth, and one on his head, he moved and my finger went into his eye, he said i hit him and assulted him of which i agree it was wrong. from reading this you prob think i am a monster.
I now know i should have handeled it differently You can't silence someone just because they are saying something you don't like; you need to learn to articulate your feelings. E.g., 'Douglas, you're entitled to your opinion. But, I am trying to better myself by applying for this job and I would really appreciate your support. It hurts when you make me out to be incapable of doing the job. Perhaps you could give me the benefit of your experience and tell me how I can acquire the qualities needed...' etc etc. Rather than grabbing his face and trying to stop his mouth from moving
He said it as over as he could not be with someone who ' would psyscialy assualt him.
LAst week we fell out and he said he didnt want to see me.. I went out, i went to the gym and then out with a mate, he called late afternnon, i didnt answer, he text me saying " can i come pick you up so we can talk" he came and picked me and drove all the way to redditch, we found a quiet spot and talked for 2 hours, we made some goals, he stayed over and all was ok..
I feel very guilty and ashamed. I love him and want him back. I didnt mean to grab him.
I went with adam and emma to collect my stuff last night, my clothes etc that i had there, I spoke to him on the phone Monday Night. he didnt want to see me as it will be very emotional day for both of us and he said he will get upset if he sees me. I went along as i had to give directions, i got out the car before they went to his house.
They got my stuff and came and picked me up, they said he couldnt look them in the face, he was very sheepish and very embarrassed.
He sent me a text on out way home saying
"Adam and Emma have collected your stuff, i founc your books, If i find anything else will let you know, cant find your carry on dvd, when i do will send it on to you. Take care Douglas."
I feel a bit awkward as He asked that neither of us have contact yesterday, yet he text me something i already knew. I am missing him so much, i worked out that 4 weeks time it will be july 10, thats his birthday, thats the ammount of time hes asked for.
i want to text him or phone im missing him so, im scared of his reply