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lostnwonderland
28th January 2004, 07:06 PM
I am in some desperate need of advise. I am 39 and my husband is 28. We have been together for over 5 years. This past week he decided that he need time away to think about our relationship. He has a 10yr old son that live 800 miles away with his ex. He visited over the holidays and she told him that she wanted him back. He told me that they had worked out some problems from their past. When he returned he told me that he was really confussed. I told him that if he wanted to be there then he needed to go. He told me a couple of days later that he wasn't going anywhere and not to worry. Well, his ex kept on calling, texting and e-mailing him. He wouldn't listen to me. I told him that if he was staying with me that he should only talk to her about their son. Well last week when he decided to leave he told me that he was going to his sisters to think things through. Well he didn't. He is now staying in a motel about 40 min. from her. We have been talking on the phone and he asked me to give him 2 weeks to figure out what he wants to do. I just don't know what I am suppossed to do. I told him I would give him the 2 weeks. He swears that he still loves me and that he misses me. I just don't see how he can be objective about anything if he is so close to her and so far from me. He can't tell me what went wrong. I do know that we have been struggling because of his lack of work and that we have lost just about everything we own. We have had to move in with my sister, which he doesn't really care for. Do I wait and see what happens? I am lost without him. He is my heart and soul. Can anyone give me any advice.

Kate
6th February 2004, 07:20 PM
This is really tough for you. Your husband is obviously emotionally involved still with his ex-wife, and very confused by the situation he finds himself in. He may also be feeling discouraged and down about the way life has been going for him.

I wonder if the hardest part for you is the fact that there is very little that you can do, but hope that the love and commitment you have had with each other will stand firm.

I assume that you are keeping in touch with him and assuring him of your love. I don't know that there is much more you can do. One of the hardest things to cope with is the helplessness, isn’t it.

I hope things turn out well for you.

Kate