scared and confused

[Unregistered]

This is the first time I even try telling anyone about my problems... I'm 23 years old, my husband is 26 and we've been married for about 1 1/2 years. I love my husband like I never thought possible, he's always been great and for a moment I actually thought he loved me more than I loved him... For the past 3 months things have changed a lot.. I feel completely alone, like he doesn't care about me. I try talking to him but there's never a good time for it. He is very sentimental and usually gets pretty bad when I try telling him that I feel like he doesn't love me.. but that's the way I feel and most of the time I try not to bring up the subject so that I don't make him feel bad.. I can't take it anymore...
I thought the reason we were having problems was due to the new business we opened about 3 months ago, but he says it has nothing to do with that..... He says he's confused and doesn't know why he feels that way.
Basically, he admits that he has changed but doesn't know why.. I'm going crazy out of my mind trying to think whats' going on... I'm sure he's not having an affair because I kow where he is at all times !!!
I asked him today if he still liked me? if maybe he got tired of me or if he liked someone else... but he says he feels the same way.. completely frustrated...
I don't know what to do.. my family who lives in another city, thinks we have the perfect marriage and I feel completely scared to even mention to them that we have problems, I don't want this to become a burden to anyone.. but it's been 3 months and I still don't know what to do..
I heard the 2nd year of marriage is difficult, so should this be normal?? What can I do?
We don't have any kids. Everyone keeps asking when are we getting pregnant which was a huge deal for us because we both love kids... but how can I even think about kids if I don't even know if he loves me or not..

Mary

[Unregistered]

I definately wouldn't get pregnant until you work everything out. My husband and I have been together for two years and I just found out that a year after we were married right after I gave birth to our son he had slept with someone else even though I thought I knew where he was at all times. We are now going to marriage counseling and for a weekend marriage encounter to see if it will help us communicate better. My husband says he had the affair because he didn't know how to deal with all the stress-maybe it is the same for your husband since you just recently opened a business.

[Liz]

Hello there,

The first few years of marriage (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/healthclub/healthearly/) can be difficult. Many of us spend our courting days on our best behaviour and shutting out any faults our loved one may have. Soon after getting married most couples go through a phase of disappointment and disillusionment, when they face up to what their partner is really like. No longer can they maintain their relationship on warm loving feelings - something stronger is needed. That's when we found that love was a daily decision, an act of will and not just warm fuzzy feelings.

When you can see love in that light, you can begin to accept and love each other warts and all and get through the disappointment to a stronger love.

Why not have a look at the area of the site about this here (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/marriageclinic/diffdisill/).

Marriage Encounter weekends (http://www.2-in-2-1.co.uk/healthclub/servprov/marenhres/meang/) are very valuable in refreshing your marriage. They are available all over the world. You will find links from the UK site to other countries if you need it.

Hang on in there

Liz
:)